I warmly welcome you to the October 2025 edition of Singles’ World. In the last edition, we examined Omugwo—a cultural and traditional practice that has, sadly, become a source of conflict in many homes. I discussed the major controversies surrounding the difficulty many couples face in deciding which of the two mothers-in-law should perform this practice.

In this edition, I wish to suggest possible interventions and practical ways to resolve such controversies. My prayer is that the Lord will use this piece to restore peace, harmony, and joy to your home in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Resolving the Controversy

As noble as this cultural practice is, if not properly managed, it can degenerate into a prolonged family feud and even breed deep-seated animosity. Therefore, it is essential for couples to discuss and agree on a plan that works best for both families.

1. Seek God’s Guidance Through Prayer

Since we are dealing with Christian homes, the first step is for the couple to pray together about it. They should jointly seek the face of God on who should come for Omugwo between the two mothers-in-law. The Holy Spirit, our Teacher and Guide, will reveal the right path.

Without the Holy Spirit, it becomes almost impossible to navigate the storms and rivers of life. Sometimes, the Holy Spirit may even instruct the couple not to invite either of the mothers-in-law. Whatever the divine direction, the couple must be sincere and united in knowing and obeying God’s will—without prejudice or deceit—especially when God’s choice may not please either or both parties.

The ability to discern the will of God depends on the couple’s spiritual maturity. When carnality and the flesh dominate, it becomes difficult to follow divine guidance. If either of the partners is not born again, it poses an even greater challenge, as the power and necessity of prayer may not be appreciated. Remember, a praying family is a winning family.

2. Alternate the Visits

Another option is to alternate Omugwo visits between the two mothers-in-law. This can serve as a fair middle ground for both families. However, the couple must ensure that they maintain a peaceful relationship with both mothers. If they strongly prefer one mother-in-law over the other, this arrangement may not work, as envy and resentment can easily arise.

For instance, how do you convince a husband’s mother to stay away when the wife’s mother comes repeatedly, or vice versa? Yet, if the couple’s relationship with both mothers is cordial and free from tension, alternating visits remains a practical and peaceful solution.

3. Communicate Openly and Honestly

The couple must engage in open communication—freely expressing their feelings, expectations, and genuine concerns. Such honest dialogue, conducted in love and without bias, will guide them to the right decision.

If it is known that one of the mothers-in-law is demonically possessed or spiritually or emotionally unstable, this must be discussed openly between the couple. Under no circumstance should one partner betray the other by revealing to the in-law the reason for her exclusion. The matter should remain confidential between the husband and wife. With godly wisdom, the couple should jointly prevent any troublesome or spiritually dangerous in-law from coming to perform Omugwo.

4. Seek Godly Counsel

 Finally, the couple may seek the guidance of a mature, Spirit-filled pastor or counsellor who is experienced in handling sensitive marital issues.

Conclusion

Flexibility, understanding, spirituality, and open communication are key factors in resolving Omugwo-related conflicts. May the blessings of God in your home never become a source of conflict, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

The post Singles’ World October ’25 appeared first on The Olive Branch.

I am delighted to welcome you to the September 2025 edition of Singles’ World. In the last edition, we considered the practice of Omugwo—a cultural and traditional institution that, unfortunately, has been the source of conflict in many families. I discussed one major controversy: deciding which of the two mothers-in-law should carry out the practice. In this edition, I wish to examine another sensitive aspect of Omugwo. My prayer is that this piece will bring light and peace to your family, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

The Controversy

When Culture Collides With Faith in the Home

One area of frequent conflict in Omugwo is the generational gap between the wife and the mother-in-law (or even the wife’s own mother). Many African mothers, despite education, exposure, and modern technology, still prefer to care for babies in traditional ways. On the other hand, most Gen Z wives, guided by education and medical advice, lean toward modern methods of childcare.

Take, for example, exclusive breastfeeding. Medical science recommends it as the healthiest practice for the first six months of a baby’s life—no water, no pap, nothing else but breast milk. To a traditional mother-in-law, this sounds strange and unnecessary. After all, she never practised it, yet her children—especially her son, now the husband—grew up strong and healthy.

Similarly, if it is the wife’s mother, she might remind her daughter: “I raised you with pap and local concoctions alongside breast milk, and you turned out fine.” Such differences easily breed conflict. Yet the Bible reminds us that “Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding” (Proverbs 4:7). Godly wisdom helps us balance cultural practices with sound knowledge.

Another area of tension is the use of local herbs (agbo) for bathing or feeding the baby. Many mothers-in-law strongly believe these herbs cure infections and skin conditions, yet they are administered without any measurement or scientific backing. In contrast, orthodox medicine prescribes precise doses with tested safety. Similarly, traditional feeding methods—like forcing pap into a baby’s mouth—clash with modern, medically advised practices.

While a wife may be able to correct her own mother, opposing her mother-in-law often feels culturally disrespectful and risky. Scripture guides us here: “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother” (Ephesians 6:1–2). Honour must be shown, but obedience is limited to what aligns with the Lord’s will.

The conflict deepens when some mothers-in-law resort to traditional medicine from diviners (babalawo), incisions or cultic rituals to address conditions like convulsions or persistent night crying. For the Christian wife, such practices are incompatible with her faith and convictions.

While spiritual attacks are real (Ephesians 6:12), such traditional solutions often expose children to demonic influence from infancy, without their knowledge or consent. This is deeply unfair and spiritually dangerous. The Bible warns us clearly: “What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God” (2 Corinthians 6:16).

Born-again Christian wives particularly struggle when their mothers-in-law hold polytheistic or syncretic beliefs. To them, there is nothing wrong with traditional or cultic remedies, but to the Christian, these are spiritual traps. The Bible says: “You shall have no other gods before Me” (Exodus 20:3).

Another controversial practice is the chanting of panegyrics (oríkì) to calm or lull a baby to sleep. While beautiful in cultural context, many of these chants invoke ancestral ties that may carry spiritual baggage. As the baby responds, the ancestral spirits behind the words may lay claims on the child. A Christian mother, taught in spiritual warfare, will oppose such chants.

Yet, if the husband is spiritually weak or overly attached to his mother, the wife bears the brunt of the conflict. Scripture says: “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6). Training must begin with guarding the child’s spiritual atmosphere.

Even if it is her own mother who chants the oríkì, the disagreement remains sharp. The mother may dismiss her daughter’s concerns with words like: “What do you know? I am your mother. These chants are harmless.” This generational and spiritual clash can easily poison the atmosphere of Omugwo. The Bible cautions: “Be not unequally yoked together with unbelievers” (2 Corinthians 6:14).

Other conflicts arise in matters of hygiene. While the wife insists on washing hands, sterilising items, or even using masks where necessary—based on antenatal training—the mother-in-law may dismiss these precautions as unnecessary. After all, she raised her children without them. This difference leaves the wife worried whenever she leaves the baby at home. Yet, sending the mother-in-law away may cause lasting offense, resentment, and animosity within the family. The Bible advises: “If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men” (Romans 12:18).

Sadly, what should be a joyful, supportive tradition—Omugwo—often turns into a source of strife, tension, and unending battles.

Conclusion

Omugwo is a tradition that should bring joy and support to families, yet the realities show that it often becomes a breeding ground for generational clashes, cultural disagreements, and spiritual conflicts. The tension between modern medical practices and age-old traditions, between faith in Christ and ancestral customs, and between honouring parents and protecting the newborn reveals how fragile this season can be. What should be a moment of peace after childbirth sometimes becomes a season of battles that test the unity of the home. The Bible is true when it says, “A wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands” (Proverbs 14:1). The wisdom or the lack of it displayed during Omugwo can determine whether the family experiences harmony or strife.

The questions remain: how should Christian couples navigate these storms? How can they embrace help without opening doors to conflict? How do they honour their parents without compromising their faith? These are weighty matters that must be carefully examined, because the future of the family—and the spiritual destiny of the child—often hangs in the balance.

As the prophet asked: “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?” (Amos 3:3).

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

The post Singles’ World September ’25 appeared first on The Olive Branch.

I am delighted to welcome you to the August 2025 edition of Singles’ World. In the previous edition, I turned our attention to the practice of Omugwo; a very beautiful cultural and traditional institution which, sadly, has become a source of conflict in many families. I discussed the meaning of Omugwo and its many benefits, as well as one of the major controversies surrounding it: who should perform the Omugwo; the wife’s mother or the husband’s mother?

It is important to reflect on this tradition and the disputes that often arise around it, so that what is intended to be a blessing to families does not turn into a source of pain or tragedy. My concern here is for Christian families in particular, so that we do not give room for the devil to sow discord and destroy our homes.

The Controversy

One of the most troubling situations occurs when the husband’s mother had strongly opposed his marriage to his wife right from the beginning. Her opposition may have been vocal and obvious, yet the son insisted on marrying the woman he loved. Now, when the marriage produces a child, the same mother insists on performing the Omugwo. While the son does not object, his wife does, and with good reason. How can she comfortably welcome a mother-in-law who once rejected her and fought against her marriage? Unless there is evidence of genuine repentance and reconciliation, such an involvement may be motivated by bitterness or hidden resentment, and this creates the potential for strife.

On the other hand, if the son decides to oppose his mother’s wish and stops her from coming, the mother may quickly assume that her daughter-in-law influenced the decision. She may then direct her hostility towards the wife. If the son boldly owns up to being the one behind the decision, both he and his wife may face open hostility and possibly even prolonged battles with the mother-in-law. Where the mother’s attitude is vindictive or malevolent, the situation could escalate into spiritual warfare.

If, in an attempt to avoid such conflicts, the couple chooses to invite the wife’s mother instead, the husband’s mother may interpret it as a deliberate attempt to rob her of her rights and privileges. She may then turn against both the wife and her mother, concluding that her daughter-in-law has conspired to deny her the honour she believes she deserves. In African societies, the mother-in-law phenomenon has grown so intense that it often takes on cult-like dimensions, leaving couples in fear of backlash and deep-seated conflicts.

Another scenario arises when a husband simply dislikes his wife’s mother for no clear reason, and insists that only his own mother must perform the Omugwo. In this case, the husband’s mother enjoys all the benefits of the tradition, while the wife’s mother is permanently sidelined. This can cause deep pain and bitterness for the wife, especially when her mother has made huge sacrifices for her.

The problem becomes even more serious where the wife happens to be the breadwinner or where she, along with her mother, had financially supported the husband, perhaps even sponsoring his journey abroad. In such situations, it is only natural for the wife to feel deeply offended when her mother is disregarded. She may begin to feel oppressed, marginalized, and silenced by her husband’s patriarchal insistence on favouring only his own mother.

This tension often spills over into the relationship between the wife and her mother-in-law. The wife may become reluctant to release money for her upkeep or unwilling to allow her full access to the baby. She may engage in subtle resistance, withholding affection or cooperation as her own way of protesting the injustice against her mother. The longer the mother-in-law stays, the more strained and toxic the atmosphere becomes.

If the mother-in-law eventually returns home, she may tell stories about her unpleasant experience in her son’s household. And more often than not, her story will be exaggerated and retold in a way that paints her daughter-in-law as wicked, disrespectful, and unfit to live with her son. Such narratives quickly spread in family and community circles, drawing sympathy for the mother-in-law and hostility against the wife. Some may even begin to pressure the son to divorce his wife, thereby deepening the rift.

This type of situation may discourage the couple from visiting their home country for a long time, knowing that the mother-in-law and her allies will be waiting to fight back. The atmosphere becomes precarious and unstable. If the family is not prayerful, careful and spiritually discerning, the marriage could suffer devastating consequences from emotional breakdowns to relentless spiritual attacks.

Conclusion

The Omugwo tradition is a wonderful and helpful cultural practice that, when properly managed, strengthens family ties and provides crucial support for new mothers. But when handled without wisdom, it can quickly turn into a weapon of division and destruction in the hands of the enemy.

As Christian families, we must approach Omugwo not merely with human wisdom, which is often earthly and short-sighted, but with the wisdom of God that is pure, peaceable, and full of mercy. Only divine wisdom can enable couples to navigate these complex family dynamics with grace, patience and love.

May the Lord keep your home, grant you peace, and give you the divine wisdom to manage the Omugwo practice in a way that honours Him and preserves the unity of your marriage, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

The post Singles’ World August ’25 appeared first on The Olive Branch.

I welcome you again to the April edition of the Singles’ World for 2025. In the last edition, I discussed sexual compatibility and its place in the Christian marriage. I looked at the Biblical perspective and the need to avoid the doctrines of the devil on this. The importance of sexual compatibility in marriage cannot, therefore, be easily over-emphasised. In this edition, I will discuss with you the influence of modernism and secularism on Christian marriage.

There are emerging false doctrines and teachings that have put the Christian marriage under siege. Many of our youth today are being persuaded along these demonic doctrines that are contrary to the Word of God. It therefore becomes necessary for the true Church of God to blow the whistle and deliver this generation from these incipient doctrinal errors that are potentially dangerous for the singles and the married. Let me share some of these doctrines with you:

1. The Word of God (The Bible): In some climes, the Bible is being reduced to the word of men written by the Europeans to enslave the Africans. There is a call by these evil teachers to decolonise the Bible and make it truly African to meet the needs of Africans. They infer that Christianity is Western, while African Traditional Religion (ATR) is African.

They teach that we should all go back to our indigenous African religion and jettison the European religion and its Bible that was written to enslave the Africans. While everybody is entitled to his or her own ideology, this is an insidious and precarious modernist thought that is orchestrated to deconstruct the foundation of Christianity. Any belief system that undermines the authority of the Word of God is demonic, and it must be rejected outright.

The Bible, the Word of God was given by the inspiration of God- 2 Timothy 3:16 for humanity. It is not the treatise of the Europeans written for the enslavement of Africans. It is on this basis that all other doctrines follow. Don’t be swayed away by any demonic modernist doctrine from the wholesome doctrine of the Lord Jesus Christ which you have known from the beginning. The Bible is the grand norm for all Christians all over the world.

2. Polygamy: Therefore, these false teachers teach that monogamy is European, while polygamy is African. They aver that the Europeans injected monogamy into the Bible to reduce the population of Africans. Consequently, some ministers now preach openly in support of polygamy. Some people in the health sector teach that polygamy is an antidote to the prevalence of prostate enlargement in men. So, the frequency of sex necessitates the need for more wives to curtail the incidence of prostate issues in men.

Besides, we are told that polygamy will put an end to many cases of women that have delays in getting marriage partners. So, polygamy will make all women to be married. This is another demonic modernist philosophy that is influencing the Christian marriage today as more Christians appear to be more comfortable with this dangerous teaching, especially that it permits lasciviousness and sexual promiscuity. Hence, it appears like a popular dogma. Some of our girls readily agree to be the second or third wife now.

However, the popularisation of polygamy is a doctrine of the devil, and it is against the Word of God on marriage. In Matt. 19:4, Jesus said God made them male and female and not males and females. In Matt. 19:5, the Bible says “For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?” The Bible talks about a man cleaving to his wife and becoming two and not about a man cleaving to his wives and becoming two.

In 1 Cor. 7:2, the Bible says “Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” The Bible does not say “let every man have his own wives but his own wife.” Don’t accept this modernist evil doctrine that is intended to plunge the Christian marriage into chaos. The doctrine is a complete siege against the Christian marriage. The Bible is divine, and we should not allow anyone to secularise or demonise it in the name of modernism.

The Bible is supreme, and it must guide the conducts of Christians all over the world. If you are of age and you are not into any relationship yet, polygamy is not the answer. Wait on the Lord, and He will settle you. God knows that you need a partner; He will answer your prayer. Besides, more wives and frequent sex are not solutions to preventing prostate cancer. Don’t be deceived. There is no disease that God cannot heal.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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It is my joy and delight to welcome you to the February edition of Singles’ World for 2025. In the last edition, I discussed vocationally incompatibility with you, which is one of the trending issues affecting the love relationships of our singles today. In this edition, I discuss habitual dysfunctions that are potentially risky for marriages. These are the unconquered habits that have been attached to our lives since childhood that are now endangering most marriages; you are married to a personality, and it is this personality that we are to live with until death do us part. What couples experience as behavioural foundational deficits is incredibly disturbing and alarming. This calls for proper parenting, so that children can be brought up well. I will now address some examples of habitual or behavioural deficits.

Many couples regularly complain that their spouses are disorganised and careless. When you live with a careless and a disorganised person, you will realise you are living with Mr Stress or Mrs Stress. A careless and disorganised person is a bad planner. He muddles things up. He will not be able to discern between minor and major issues, important and frivolous issues, and significant and insignificant issues. When your partner is discussing very important issues, the careless partner may introduce or interject frivolous matters that he considers serious. He overlooked important details. He often makes mistakes without claiming responsibility for his actions but often makes excuses for his mistakes. Such a person acts on impulse without thinking about the consequences. He will disregard the established rules, procedures and safety protocols. Careless people are always reckless. He would like to engage in risky activities without thinking about potential dangers.

 Another trait is poor time management. He does not prioritise tasks, and that is why he will miss deadlines. Such a person will always procrastinate. How do you feel when your partner always postpones the important assignments given to him or her?  How do you live with someone who has an incorrect attitude towards time? Your partner is given a deadline to submit his application for employment, but he handles it with levity until the deadline expires. Your spouse makes you get to church services late every time. She always arrives at her duty place late, and there are complaints from her employers.

In addition, such people are always easily distracted. These are serious issues that can destabilise families. These observations are serious issues that families constantly battle. This began with individuals in their childhood. Unfortunately, some parents try their best and do not succeed, while others do not make much effort to discipline their children and prevent them from growing up with habitual dysfunction that will eventually ruin their lives and families.

Forgetfulness is another habitual dysfunction. Can you imagine your partner forgetting to brush his teeth every day? Can you imagine your partner forgetting to flush the toilet after using it? Can you imagine your partner forgetting to lock the door after coming inside it? Can you imagine your partner forgetting his or her car key at all times? There are families where partners regularly experience all this from their spouses without any solution. It is very challenging to be sincere.

Honestly, it is difficult to live with a partner in this habitual mess. However, the truth is that you cannot divorce your partner because of the character’s delinquency. In addition, individuals should be sincere to themselves and accept that they have these issues. They should then work on themselves and clean up their behavioural deficiencies. The problem is that after marriage, most people do not do anything to improve their character, especially when their spouses and others have been complaining of these unethical habits.

To minimise conflicts and reduce tension in the family, individuals should accept responsibility for their inappropriate and unacceptable behaviours, and take steps to overcome them. The singles should work assiduously on their characters before they get married. There is no point pretending that you are virtuous when indeed you are as rottenness in the bones of your partner-Prov. 12:4. Nobody is perfect and flawless. However, when there are noticeable, unquestionable, and unbearable flaws in your life, your best way is to address them diligently without any pretence. Practical steps, counselling, and prayers should be deployed, including deliverance, if necessary, to address them before it becomes too late.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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Welcome to the November edition of the Singles’ World. In the last edition, I discussed genotype incompatibility as another foundational issue that has disrupted many marriages and made many homes miserable in life. I also discussed the position of the Faith-Based School of Thought that believes that genotype incompatibility is not important in marriage because reliance on God’s guidance is superior to scientific guidance. In addition, I discussed the position of the Scientific or Pragmatic School of Thought that emphasises genotype compatibility to avoid marital calamity.

In this edition, I want to give you the second part of my discourse on genotype compatibility. This is to further deepen our knowledge of genotype compatibility in marriage. It is true we do not have direct Biblical references to support the need for genotype compatibility in marriage, and the Bible does not explicitly mention genotype compatibility as one of the principles to deploy to have harmony in marriage. However, there are Biblical references to show that God has set some boundaries for Christian marriage which can also be applied to genotype compatibility. The purpose is to guide our marriages against what could have been avoided. Obedience is better than sacrifice. I will now address the other compatibilities in the Bible to show the need for genotype compatibility.

Salvation or Faith Compatibility:

The Bible talks explicitly about the need for Christians not to be unequally yoked together with unbelievers, especially in a marriage relationship according to 2 Cor. 6:14-16. In other words, a Christian is incompatible with an unbeliever in a marriage relationship. 1 Cor. 7:39 says “A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.” This scripture emphasises the importance of compatibility within the bounds of faith. While many sound ministers of God preach and support this theology, some do not emphasise it. Even some youths today do not really bother about faith compatibility when considering their marriage plans just as some do not bother about genotype compatibility which is fundamental to the joy and fulfilment of marriages.

Blood Group Transfusion Compatibility

In the medical sciences, the place of blood group compatibility cannot be easily over-emphasised. The blood group system has been categorised into: A, B, AB, and O. According to the rules,

• A can receive from A and O

• B can receive from B and O

• AB can receive from AB, A, B, and O

• O can receive from O (universal donor)

• A and B are incompatible

• A and AB are incompatible

• B and AB are incompatible

• O and A or B are incompatible

No blood transfusion can be done without first carrying out blood type compatibility tests. This cannot be contested or challenged. Those who have faith to allow AS + AS or AS + SS to be married on the grounds that they are following the guidance of God, should also apply faith and jettison the blood group compatibility test and risk severe haemolytic reactions. The Bible is quiet on Blood Group Compatibility Test, and yet those who need blood transfusion services submit themselves to this test and improve their health conditions. I see those who counsel people against genotype compatibility test as religious zealots, and those who marry without checking their genotype compatibility are taking very serious risks about their lives. Even those who object to blood group transfusion for their children because of their religious doctrines are not right from the legal point of view. Of course, nobody can force an adult to submit himself or herself to any medical services against his or her will.

When God created Adam, He created a woman that was compatible with him. In Genesis 2:18, The Bible in Basic English says” I will make one like himself as a help to him” and “I will make a suitable companion to help him” (GNT). The Bible here talks about a wife that is suitable for Adam; a wife that is like Adam. God made a wife that was compatible with and suitable for Adam. So, suitability can be used synonymously with compatibility. God wanted a woman that would be suitable for Adam. God did not have to mention blood genotype specifically.

I am of the view that God is not against genotype compatibility in our marriage relationships. When we neglect this very important issue of life as we run our lives, we are endangering our lives and the lives of our unborn children. When we submit ourselves to the genotype compatibility test to guide our decision in marriage, we are not in any way compromising divine guidance to enjoy our marriage. Don’t start the battle that you cannot fight or win.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

The post Singles’ World November Edition ’24 appeared first on The Olive Branch.

We have been dealing with foundational issues in marriage and have focused on demonic in-laws. In this edition, I will discuss how to recognise and discern demonic in-laws. Do not forget that foundational issues are usually complicated to tackle in any marriage, and that they can destabilise the home. I pray that the Lord will give you the right understanding in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

How To Recognise Demonic In-Laws.

1. By their Fruits: One way to recognize them is by their fruits. If you are in courtship, and you are very observant, you will recognise them through their words and conduct. If there is stiff opposition to your marriage by your prospective mother-in-law or father-in-law for flimsy reasons, you should know that you will have issues with such a woman or man in the future if you finally marry their son or daughter. If they always suggest that you go with them to see a special prophet or a diviner concerning the person you want to marry or use a specially prepared medicine from the diviner, and you always object to their suggestions, this is an indication that your prospective in-laws are idolatrous and fetishistic. And that is the way they will be relating to you after marriage. If you refuse, they will operate surreptitiously. If you visit them, they may want to treat you as a house girl by indiscriminately sending you on errands. This is a warning.

You will have to be on your guard when they visit you and even when you visit them. To eat the food they prepare for you becomes an issue. Any gift they offer you will be an object of suspicion. Such in-laws hide under the garb of Christianity to pollute you. However, they were not fully given to Jesus Christ. They will always tell you partner not to travel on certain days or use a particular colour because of what the prophet on the mount has said. They are usually very curious about your partner. They always want to find out personal details about her which are not their business. Even when they see you, they will ask you indirectly and ask your fiancé directly or indirectly. Listen to her complaints when you visit. These are indications of what you will face after your marriage.

2. Through Prayers: If you give yourself to prayers, the Lord can reveal to you the real identity of your in-law, especially your mother-in-law. You may see her pursuing you in your dreams or carrying a black calabash and making incantations. You may also see her warning you not to marry her son if you do not want trouble. You may see her hiding from you or being in the midst of women wearing red or black clothing. Sometimes you may see her standing between you and your partner. The Lord is telling you she will be a great hindrance to your marriage. You may also see your prospective father-in-law trying to sleep with you in your dream.

You may see him pursuing you. He or she may be forcing you to eat or drink something in your dream. A particular mother-in-law slept with her son in the dream. Ask the Lord in prayers to reveal your prospective in-laws to you. Your prayers can reveal them in your dreams and in their acts. Regardless of how deceptive they are, the Lord can reveal them to you.

3. Though discerning of spirits: If you have a very close relationship with the Holy Spirit, he can reveal who your in-laws are to you. The Holy Spirit is our teacher and guide. If you have the gift of discerning of spirits, they cannot hide from you for long.

4. Through observation: If you are very observant, you can quarry the personality of your in-law from your discussion with your partner from time to time. Statements like “Oh! My mum is too stressful and curious!” “My mum will not let me rest, always calling and beeping my phone, ah!” “My mum is too difficult to please.” From these statements, you can have some idea about the personality of your prospective mother-in-law. This method will also help you to know all your prospective in-laws that are likely to be close to you after your marriage.

If the revelations show that you are going to have it tough with your in-laws in the future, it is advisable to quit the relationship or weigh the consequences before consummating the relationship. If you are fortunate to have a spiritual and smart fiancé who can manage his mother-in-law or father-in-law very well and curtail their excesses physically and spiritually without exposing you to dangers, you may go ahead with the relationship provided the Lord has ordained the two of you as husband and wife.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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In the May edition of the Singles’ World, I discussed demonic fathers-in-law and mothers-in-law who will be great hindrances to the success of your marriage, and I gave a life experience to illustrate this. Don’t forget that a foundational issue such as having demonic in-laws is complicated to manage. The antidote to it is to avoid them if you want to enjoy your life and live long. In this edition, I will also share another life experience. I pray that the Lord will use this edition to bless your life in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

1. There are demonic in-laws. By my calling as a pastor, I am privileged to know families that have been wrecked by demonic in-laws. There is a Christian brother who got married a few years ago. His parents always wanted to treat him as their son; they barely recognised the position of his wife. The father, at the time, even offered to rent a house for his son and pay for the rent when he and his wife were earning good salaries. He wanted him and his wife to pack into the house he had rented for them after their wedding. The wife objected to it, but the son had no reason to oppose his father’s supposed generosity.

The father would sometimes visit them and inspect the house to see if there was any need for repairs. For the son, it was normal, but for the wife, his father-in-law must leave them and allow them to live as husband and wife without undue interference. Any opposition to the domination of her father-in-law was seen as an insult from an ordinary wife or small girl whose forwardness and brazenness must be resisted firmly. Despite the son’s comfortable salary, he could account for how he spent his monthly salary. It was the wife who shouldered the family responsibility mostly.

The husband knew something was wrong with him, but he could not act against the wishes of his parents. One day the husband’s parents accused their son’s wife of being responsible for their son’s predicament. The parents went to find out from the diviners who said their daughter-in-law had an evil spirit which she was using to manipulate her husband whereas they were the manipulative ones because they were demonically possessed. The husband usually had dreams where his father was either preparing a sacrifice or asking him to carry the sacrifice. His younger brothers had earlier warned him to run away from their parents because they were demonically possessed, but he was too weak to act against the wishes of his parents even though he claimed to be a Christian.

Despite his pastor’s intervention, the man could not argue with his parents. His wife who was more vocal and desperate in liberating her husband was placed under demonic surveillance by her in-laws. They vowed to deal with her for not allowing them to have full access to their son. When the attacks were coming to her torrentially, and her spiritual stamina could not withstand them, she had to leave the house and run for dear life. The wife has been warned by her parents according to revelations that they heard that she must not have any contact with her husband or else she would die. The marriage has crashed. A demonic gulf has been created between the couple who must not see each other. Pitiably, the man is a caricature of himself now, and the wife is living a solitary life. Unfortunately, the man’s parents are happy that their son is living alone; they can now have full access to his miserable life anytime.

There is another fairly old mother-in-law who breastfed the baby of her daughter-in-law when she was busy in the kitchen. She secretly sneaked into the room of her daughter-in-law where the baby was and breastfed him. It was a messy and shameful confrontation when the wife of her son caught her. It was a demonic breastfeeding as it was later discovered. Of course, the husband took side with her mother and saw nothing strange or unusual in the breastfeeding of her baby by her mother. The mother-in-law was polluting and initiating the baby into occultism. The wife discerned that correctly, but the husband was spiritually blind.

Expectedly, the marriage crashed. This was a man who married after 40 years, and yet the household wickedness, symbolised by this mother-in-law, finally returned her son to his bachelorhood status. These demonic in-laws are common in society today, and many young men and women enter into their hands ignorantly through marriage. It is usually difficult to detach or extricate one’s marriage from the hands of such evil and atrocious in-laws. They are difficult foundational problems that stifle and choke many marriages. The Lord will help you to obey.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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In the last edition of the Singles’ World, I discussed the second type of demonic and possessive mothers-in-law which can be a very serious foundational problem in marriages. This mother-in-law does not want her daughter or son to get married. That is her decision, and she stands by it. For her, it is a sign that she loves you. When it is time for you to settle down in life, she becomes hostile and antagonistic to your plan to get married. Of course, such mothers may not come out plainly to say it, but her body language says it all. Even some of her utterances show that she does not want you to get married. If you proceed despite her opposition, be ready for a very long battle. That is a very serious foundational problem. I said such a problem is better avoided than managed if you want to live long and have joy and happiness. It is my prayer that this edition will be of tremendous blessing to you in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

1. There are demonic in-laws. Some fathers-in-law and mothers-in-law have occult powers. I will share one life experience with you here to give credence to this discourse. First, occultists are those who practise spiritism, occultism, necromancy, and divination. Some of them are members of secret cults that are generally regarded as Satanic such as the Ogboni Fraternity, Illuminati, Guru Maharaji etc.

Some of them are real Babalawo, sorcerers and witches etc. Many of them have big positions in the church to hide their real demonic personalities. Imagine if your mother-in-law is Iyaloja or Iyalaje of her town or village. She is one of the leading witches in that town who superintends over the markets and the wealth of the land. The traditional marketplace is the rendezvous for the kingdom of darkness, especially the witches wizards and also marine spirits. Can you imagine if your father-in-law is the Olori Awo (Head of the diviners) in the town? He is in charge of every sacrifice that is made in that town. He is the right-hand man of the king of the town.

Don’t forget that such a man has eaten with the deities and has made covenants to be loyal to all the ancestral powers that govern the land. He is at their service. He gives whatever the deities ask for including her son or daughter or son-in-law or daughter-in-law. For him or her, it is not a big deal. His or her refusal will be calamitous. The deities will either go for him or her or take any of his or her children by force.

If your father-in-law is a member of the Ogboni Fraternity, you and your husband are not safe, and if your mother-in-law is a witch like the witch of Endor in I Samuel 28, your family is in trouble. Occultism is very prevalent in our world today because of the struggle for power, position and wealth. It is a world of the survival of the fittest.

Besides, in our world that is bedevilled with insecurity where lives and property can no longer be guaranteed by the government, people resort to occultism for protection, especially when the places of worship that were once considered sacred are being desecrated with impunity, and the priests at the altars are butchered like animals.

The belief in God is no longer seen by some people as a lasting solution; they must take their destiny into their hands is their mantra. Members of these secret societies live in our midst. They have children who will get married one day. The probability that they will get married to children from Christian families is usually there. If you are married to the son or daughter of a demonic father-in-law or a demonic mother-in-law, it can be a very serious foundational issue that can destabilise and even crush your home.

Some years ago, there was a Christian sister in a Nigerian university who never liked to talk about her father when others were talking about their parents in school. She was always talking about her mother, and her father was alive. A Christian brother who was close to her summoned up the courage one day and asked why she was not always talking about her father. The sister first took a deep breath and then told this brother that her father was a secret cult member who had donated her to the cult to replace him after his death. She was the firstborn, and she was ready to get married, but she dared not go home with her fiancé. She constantly lived in fear of the unknown of what would happen to her. During the holidays, she had nowhere to go to.

Besides, her dreams were very scary. She spent all her time praying, but it was a problem that was too much for her to bear. Her fiancé was equally scared of getting married to a woman who would soon replace her father in the kingdom of darkness. Imagine you getting married to such a woman or a man! The father had already made a covenant with the devil, without her knowledge and permission, to enthrone her on his seat and hand over his demonic mantle to her after his death. Of course, the devil was waiting for the man to die before activating the covenant.

In that case, both the sister and her fiancé were troubled and confused although that brother volunteered to assist her in prayers. If you are married to such a sister who had been covenanted to the devil, you are in for a real battle. Even a visit to such a father-in-law’s house is a big risk because you cannot be too sure of what he can do to you. A visit to such a mother-in-law’s house can be hazardous. Members of secret cults are secretive, mendacious, unpredictable, unreliable, untrustworthy, deceitful, vindictive and dangerous. When they give you water to drink, it may not be ordinary water. Their birthday ceremonies may be opportunities to make sacrifices to their gods, pollute and initiate their guests with demonic foods.

If you are privileged to know that your would-be father-in-law or mother-in-law is a member of a secret society or a man or woman who uses occult powers, run away.  If you want to stay and serve as his or her deliverer, make sure you have the calling and the anointing and also be sure that you are led by God. Otherwise, you are going to live a life of endless, ceaseless and avoidable battles, and either you or your partner may not survive it. I hope to let you see how you can recognise this type of in-laws subsequently. Someone said, “Bad in-laws can turn a loving marriage into a living hell.”  Forewarned is forearmed. May the Lord help you and prevent you from entering into the hands of evil and demonic in-laws in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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You are warmly welcome to the March edition of the Singles’ World. In the last edition, I concluded my discussion on demonic children as one of the foundational problems rocking families today. In this edition, I will discuss another very serious foundational and fundamental issue affecting many homes. The import of this is for the singles to avoid it and for those who are facing it to recognise the enormity of the challenges and tackle them by the wisdom of God. It is my sincere prayers that you will not enter into this debacle in the name of Jesus Christ, and if you are already into it, the Lord will deliver you. 

Demonic and Possessive Mother-in-Law: As I said in the previous editions, foundational issues in marriage are usually very difficult to resolve. Prevention, as they say is not just better than cure, it is cheaper. Proverbs 22:3 says “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished.” First, God expects you to be wise. It is that wisdom, which is the principal thing, according Prov. 4:7 that will make you see evil coming and hide yourself.

When a wise man sees the evil coming and refuses to hide himself, the Bible says. He will be punished. The Bible does not say he will be pardoned or protected. Even if the Lord forgives him of his disobedience, he will still suffer the consequences. If the Lord tells you not to marry an unbeliever and you refuse and marry him, when he turns you into his punching bag; that is your punishment for your disobedience. Of course, God will forgive you if you genuinely repent. So, foundational issues are better avoided than managed.

In many cultures of the world, in-laws occupy prominent positions in the marriage institution. In Africa, for instance, you are not just married to your spouse but to the entire family of your spouse. The roles of the father-in-law and the mother-in-law are quite very cultural and traditional. Jethro was Moses’ father-in-law in the Bible; the father of Zipporah, the wife of Moses. The timely godly management skill that he gave Moses helped him greatly in his ministerial assignment.

When Isaac took Rebekah, the Bible says, he brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent-Gen. 24:67.  So, here we see that Sarah was Rebekah’s mother-in-law. In-laws can be greatly helpful, and they can be terribly nasty and irritating. The focus here is to look at the demonic and possessive in-laws who are majorly mothers-in-law, although we do have some very antagonistic fathers-in law. From research and experience, mothers-in-law can be that terrible, as they often constitute nuisance in the families of their children. We will look at a particular type of mother-in-law here now.

A.    There are women whose children are their eyes. They possess them in totality. This is not a natural but a demonic possession. Some of them believe that when their sons get married, their wives will take away their love from them. Therefore, they will not have full access to their sons anymore.  It is their husbands that will be reaping all their labours on them. They wonder why their children cannot visit them when they like. They are not always comfortable that their children want to get married. They will do everything possible to delay their marriage proposals and waste their time. In essence, such women are ‘married’ to their own children. If you want to marry the son of such a woman, it is going to be war. Be ready to marry her and her mother. There may be a soul tie between such a woman and her son.

 In most cases, it is this woman that will be running your house for you. Your husband, who is mummy’s boy, will always take to his mummy advice because of the special love that he has for her. When she comes visiting, that is the Thatcher of the house giving you orders on how she wants her son’s house to look like. If you have such a mother-in-law, you have two husbands, your mother-in-law first and then your husband. Remember, you cannot serve two masters. Some of the traits of such a mother-in-law are listed below:

1.     She wants to know your earnings and the earnings of her son.  

2.     She wants to know how much your husband is giving you on monthly basis; if it is too much, she will tell her son to reduce it. She may not talk if it is small. She has come to stop you from ‘wasting’ her son’s resources.

3.     She wants to know your menstrual cycle.

4.     She wants to know if you are pregnant or not and also your expected day of delivery (EDD) because of her curiosity. And if you are not pregnant on time, she already has her solutions whether you like it or not.

5.     She will dictate what she wants to eat and what you should cook for her son.

6.     If she is agile, she can take over your kitchen from you and begin to cook for her son.

7.     She does not need your permission to enter her son’s bedroom after all, it her son’s house. 

8.     Her son is the apple of her eye, and nothing must happen to him.  

9.     When she is not staying with you, she can summon her son to come and see her without giving him any adequate notice. You dare not oppose that lest you are in trouble. She can even ask all of you to come home and spend Christmas with her.  

10.  If you are busy or your baby is crying, she can breastfeed your baby for you without your permission and you dare not protest. There will be trouble.

When you see that your partner is mummy’s boy or mama’s boy according to the US English, please don’t wait. Run for dear life. Neither you nor your husband will be able to manage such a domineering, manipulative, oppressive, demonic and cantankerous mother-in-law. Can you imagine someone having Jezebel as mother-in-law?

 In most cases, your husband will be a yes-man to his mum. He will not like to offend her. In such homes, the wife is more or else like a housemaid or a slave. Many of such mothers-in-law are in society today, and they are posing great dangers to the families of their children. It is a fundamental issue that those who are into it may have to battle with for a very long time. If you like, be praying that they should die by fire, it may take time and the damages done to the home may be monumental, calamitous, irredeemable and irreparable. 

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month.

Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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