It is my joy and delight to welcome you to the February edition of Singles’ World for 2025. In the last edition, I discussed vocationally incompatibility with you, which is one of the trending issues affecting the love relationships of our singles today. In this edition, I discuss habitual dysfunctions that are potentially risky for marriages. These are the unconquered habits that have been attached to our lives since childhood that are now endangering most marriages; you are married to a personality, and it is this personality that we are to live with until death do us part. What couples experience as behavioural foundational deficits is incredibly disturbing and alarming. This calls for proper parenting, so that children can be brought up well. I will now address some examples of habitual or behavioural deficits.

Many couples regularly complain that their spouses are disorganised and careless. When you live with a careless and a disorganised person, you will realise you are living with Mr Stress or Mrs Stress. A careless and disorganised person is a bad planner. He muddles things up. He will not be able to discern between minor and major issues, important and frivolous issues, and significant and insignificant issues. When your partner is discussing very important issues, the careless partner may introduce or interject frivolous matters that he considers serious. He overlooked important details. He often makes mistakes without claiming responsibility for his actions but often makes excuses for his mistakes. Such a person acts on impulse without thinking about the consequences. He will disregard the established rules, procedures and safety protocols. Careless people are always reckless. He would like to engage in risky activities without thinking about potential dangers.

 Another trait is poor time management. He does not prioritise tasks, and that is why he will miss deadlines. Such a person will always procrastinate. How do you feel when your partner always postpones the important assignments given to him or her?  How do you live with someone who has an incorrect attitude towards time? Your partner is given a deadline to submit his application for employment, but he handles it with levity until the deadline expires. Your spouse makes you get to church services late every time. She always arrives at her duty place late, and there are complaints from her employers.

In addition, such people are always easily distracted. These are serious issues that can destabilise families. These observations are serious issues that families constantly battle. This began with individuals in their childhood. Unfortunately, some parents try their best and do not succeed, while others do not make much effort to discipline their children and prevent them from growing up with habitual dysfunction that will eventually ruin their lives and families.

Forgetfulness is another habitual dysfunction. Can you imagine your partner forgetting to brush his teeth every day? Can you imagine your partner forgetting to flush the toilet after using it? Can you imagine your partner forgetting to lock the door after coming inside it? Can you imagine your partner forgetting his or her car key at all times? There are families where partners regularly experience all this from their spouses without any solution. It is very challenging to be sincere.

Honestly, it is difficult to live with a partner in this habitual mess. However, the truth is that you cannot divorce your partner because of the character’s delinquency. In addition, individuals should be sincere to themselves and accept that they have these issues. They should then work on themselves and clean up their behavioural deficiencies. The problem is that after marriage, most people do not do anything to improve their character, especially when their spouses and others have been complaining of these unethical habits.

To minimise conflicts and reduce tension in the family, individuals should accept responsibility for their inappropriate and unacceptable behaviours, and take steps to overcome them. The singles should work assiduously on their characters before they get married. There is no point pretending that you are virtuous when indeed you are as rottenness in the bones of your partner-Prov. 12:4. Nobody is perfect and flawless. However, when there are noticeable, unquestionable, and unbearable flaws in your life, your best way is to address them diligently without any pretence. Practical steps, counselling, and prayers should be deployed, including deliverance, if necessary, to address them before it becomes too late.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

The post Singles’ World February Edition ’25 appeared first on The Olive Branch.

Compliments of the season to you all! Welcome to the first edition of Singles’ World in 2025. In the last edition, I discussed spatial incompatibility with you, which I consider an important foundational issue that can unsettle many homes if not resolved before marriage. If the man faces north and the woman faces south, they are spatially incompatible. You must resolve where both of you will settle in life, or else you may just be a nomadic or visiting couple. You will not really know each other, and your children may lack fatherly care, motherly care, or both. Besides, you may open the doors of your home to strange women and strange men. When infidelity sets in, divorce or broken home is inevitable.

In this edition, we will look at vocational or career incompatibility as another foundational issue that many intending couples often gloss over before marrying. When a marriage is built on vocational incompatibility, there will be upheavals that can be injurious to the stability of the home. You may be genetically and spatially compatible, and yet you are not vocationally compatible. In Genesis 2:18, God said he would provide Adam with an helpmeet that is suitable or compatible with him. You and your partner must be compatible physically, spiritually, intellectually, vocationally etc. or else there will be schism.

 If we are honest and sincere about ourselves during courtship, our problems will be manageable, but we sometimes become desperate in getting married and overlook the weightier matters of life that can weigh down our marriages. For instance, if you are called a pastor in the future, it is not any sister that you can marry. This is because it is not every Christian sister that is wired to marry a pastor. A pastor’s wife should be godly, virtuous, humble, supportive, hospitable, prayerful, wise, faithful, teachable and loyal to her husband, family and church.  A woman who is a human rights activist, feminist, or political activist will be incompatible with her husband’s pastoral ministry. This is because the core values of a pastoral ministry are radically different from those of human rights activism or feminism.

A feminist touts gender equality by compromising the biblical stand on the head position of the husband in the family. I have heard cases of women who refused to cooperate with their husbands’ pastoral ministries on the grounds that they were not called into the pastoral ministry. This can be challenging if it is not addressed before marriage. If you marry a potential pastor when you know undoubtedly that your vocation or personality is incompatible with the core values of the pastoral ministry of your husband, you are preparing for unmanageable trouble.

In addition, if you are a costumier or a professional theatre practitioner, whose vocation demands the deployment of African myths and rituals, traditional music and dance as well as the extensive use of makeups on stage, you are incompatible with a man called into the pastoral ministry. Of course, if your vocation is a Christian drama, you are compatible with a man’s pastoral ministry.   

Similarly, the work of a missionary involves frequent relocation, cultural adjustments, and unpredictable living conditions. If you value a settled lifestyle, you should not marry a missionary. Some Christian missionary organisations today ensure that missionaries marry missionaries to ensure stability in families.

In addition, if you are an 8-to-4 office worker and you want to marry a military officer whose work requires frequent deployments and unpredictable schedules that can be very challenging for a spouse with a traditional office job, you may not enjoy a settled home for life.  Again, if you are a politician, your life as a public officer requires transparency. Such a man is incompatible with a woman who is a private investigator, detective or investigative journalist whose job requires confidentiality.

In the Bible, Aquila and Priscilla as a married couple shared a vocational compatibility as tentmakers and ministers- Acts 18:2-3. Ruth and Boaz too were vocationally compatible as farmers and harvesters. Therefore, vocational compatibility is important in marriage relationships. If you are married to a spouse whose career is incompatible with yours, it is a terrible foundational problem that you will have to face for many years. It may be difficult to change one’s career after marriage in order to resolve the debacle. Prevention is usually cheaper, safer and more effective. May the Lord help you.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

The post Singles’ World January Edition ’25 appeared first on The Olive Branch.

Welcome to the February edition of the Singles’ World.  In the last edition, I discussed demonic children as one of the foundational problems affecting many homes and families today. In this edition, I will continue from where I stopped. It is my prayer that the Lord will deliver families that are going through this in the name of Jesus Christ. 

• Demonic Children: Some consult babalawo (diviner). Some of the medicines obtained from these sources are directed to be used weirdly either before copulation or after copulation. Some are used by both the couple. Some women are asked to strap plantain stems or yam tubers on their backs at some specific hours of the day or of the night to symbolise the presence of the upcoming baby. Some can also be asked to carry some sacrifices to aid their quick conception.

Babies produced through all these traditional and demonic interventions are in our midst today as friends, classmates, roommates, bunkmates, siblings etc. They too will want to get married one day. Unfortunately, their consent was not sought before their parents obtained them from the idols with covenants. They had no control over their parentage or ancestry. Now that they are grown up adults, they want to live and enjoy what others are enjoying too including getting married.

Apart from those who deliberately consult diviners and idols, some demonic powers can tamper with the pregnancies of some women and exchange the babies in their wombs with demonic ones without the knowledge of the expectant mother. That is why they often say that pregnant women must not go out at 1:00 p.m. or enter the traditional market places in the afternoon. It is also said that pregnant women should not go to the riverside in the afternoon or go out at night.

It is believed that these demonic forces are very active at such periods. That is why pregnant women must be prayerful and be born again if they are not. They should regularly cover themselves with the blood of Jesus Christ. They have no reasons to be afraid as long as they are in Christ Jesus. Those that are not in Christ Jesus are not safe from this demonic oppression and possession. Their pregnancies can be manipulated and their babies will be demonised unknown to the parents.

We have many of them in society today causing troubles and pains. Isaiah 30:9 says “That this is a rebellious people, lying children, children that will not hear the law of the Lord.” Those are children that curse their fathers-Prov. 30:11. Those who can curse their parents can kill their spouses when they get married, because they are demonic children.

Getting married to them is like getting married to the devil. In most cases, they may not know these foundational issues that surround their birth. Some parents will not tell them, and some parents, after getting their babies, renege on the promises and the covenants they made with the idols; the goat they promised to bring to the babalawo annually, the dog or pig they promised to give Olokun yearly. Hence, the young man will face battles in life even before he gets married.  

Some of the characteristics of such people obtained from the idols are listed below:

1. Battling with spirit wife/husband.
2. Polluted foundation
3. Sexual lust and perversion
4. Excessive and uncontrollable anger
5. Regular and constant evil dreams
6. Lateness in getting married
7. Attracted to the wrong partner
8. Deadlock in marriage
9. Hostility in the home
10. Childlessness
11. Poverty
12. Adultery and Divorce
13. Untimely death

The manifestations are inexhaustible. If such people get married, welcome to a marriage of continuous and endless battles, conflicts and struggles without any end in sight. You are not just battling with your spouse; you are in battle with invisible forces behind the birth of your partner. How can you live with emere or ogbanje (spirit child) as your spouse and not have troubles in life. There is no free gift from the devil. When the devil asks you for your cap, he will come for your head later. When he asks you for an egg, he will take a hen from you soon. There is no how you can resolve such marital conflicts in the house without doing something about the polluted foundation of your partner.

If you are already married to a spirit in a human form or to a man or woman with a polluted foundation, how do you get out of this bondage? How do you identify such people? It is only God that can reveal such people to you if you are patient in prayers. Even the person may not know, but the manifestations will be obvious in his life. They are usually difficult, troublesome and uncontrollable children. By the time they are married, it is hell, mehn! If you are lucky to know that your parents asked of you from the idols of the land with covenants attached to it, you need to:

1. Give your life to Jesus Christ and be born again genuinely now.  
2. Repent of your sins.
3. Renounce every known and unknown covenant either made by you or made on your behalf.
4. Go for a thorough deliverance from the foundational bondage.
5. Be filled with the Holy Ghost with the evidence of speaking in tongues.
6. Attend regularly a Bible believing church.
7. Live a holy life.
8. Study the Bible regularly
9. Have a regular personal fellowship with the Lord.
10. Pray without ceasing.

If the Lord sets you free, you will be free indeed. Until you are born again and delivered, don’t get married yet. If the Lord reveals that your future partner or the man or woman you intend to talk to about marriage has this evil foundation, it is advisable to keep off or else, you will be in for troubles for life or for a very long time. It is not a law; it is an advice. Foundational issues in marriage are very difficult to resolve or tackle. The best way is to avoid them. Proverbs 27:12 says “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished.”

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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Disclaimer: This isn’t an end of year review.

“Awake sleeping soldier, your time is now…”

Dear reader,

This is my message to you in 2024, The year of awakening. I would love it if you kept it somewhere where you can always go back to it. Somewhere that is obvious. Let it be a reminder, let it always rejuvenate, and let it reside in you.

The year 2023 is gone, and a lot probably happened. Either good or bad. It may have been joyful for some and terrible for some. It may also have been the regular year. Whatever it was, the year is gone.
Personally, 2023 was a trying year for me. It was up, down, down, down, down, then up, and it sustained a plateau. Picture the graph I just described, and you can understand and maybe relate.
Everyone is going through something, and we all have that one thing that people can’t understand but only God can.

And this is the message I bring to you today.

The message of salvation.
The message of God.
The message of Christ.

You must have heard it before, and you may not have ever heard about it. The son of God who died for your sins over 3000 years ago. I know it doesn’t sound logical; your scientific brain cannot piece it together, but there is one thing I can proudly beat my chest and say: Jesus exists, and he died for you and for me.

‭‭2024, the year of awakening 

John‬ ‭3:16‬ ‭KJV‬‬
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

And to those who have heard about this Jesus before and think you know it, after all, you can say John 3:16 from your heart. You think you have given your life after all you said the prayer 5 years ago, but your life is still the same, with the inconsistencies between your actions and the word of God (the Bible). This message is also for you.

I bring you to the story of life that became man so that he could die and give you that life.
The salvation story to me is an oxymoron. Life had to die to give you life. To give me life.

The first step to your awakening is this salvation.
You can do your introspection and be honest; I am not watching you, and I am not seeing you. You know what you do in the open and in secret, and Jesus wants you to let him in. He wants to help you if only you just let him in.

‭‭Revelation‬ ‭3:20‬ ‭NLT‬‬
“Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends.”

Reflect on these words, and if you have decided within your heart that you’re ready, just say this prayer:

“Dear Lord,

I come before you with a humble heart, acknowledging my need for salvation. I recognize that I am a sinner and in need of your forgiveness. I believe in your Son, Jesus Christ, that He died on the cross for my sins and rose again. I repent of my sins and ask for your mercy and grace.

I invite Jesus into my heart to be my Lord and Savior. Please cleanse me, renew me, and guide me in your ways. Thank you for your love and the gift of eternal life. I surrender my life to you, and I choose to follow you from this day forward to shine your light in all I do.

In Jesus’ name, I pray.

Amen.”

Now the main matter. 2024, The year of Awakening.
Most of us have been hibernating, but that hibernation is gradually turning to deep sleep, coma, and now a vegetative state.
How long will you continue to remain in mediocrity? How long will you continue to bury those talents? How long will you allow your life to fade away gradually? No impact? No progress?
This is where most of us aren’t honest. If you’re a child of God, recently adopted or long-time, your destiny isn’t at the bottom of the food chain. You are meant and destined for greatness. In whatever place or capacity God has placed you. You are made for more.

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭5:14‬ ‭NLT
“You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.”

As a child of God, your progress should be measured by God, not the world.
What is your God-given and God-ordained purpose?
Why were you born?

I apologize for my tone, but this is a charge that I want you to remember.
Aren’t you tired of going round in circles?
There is so much more! So much more!

You have wasted so much time writing down plans, with no execution.
This is the time to act! Wake up for goodness’ sake and take that action. Take that step.

And yes, this charge is also for me.

It is time to let the world see the power of God.

You might start January with so much energy, but then it’s June, and your energy level has dropped to -5, and you’re back to square one.
That is why this message will need to be inscribed in your heart.
It is God that will give you the grace for consistency, but you must choose and decide to act on it.
Let me say something else: I know life has given you lemons, I know life has dealt some horrible cards, and I cannot imagine the extent of the trauma, but there’s a secret I will let you in on: you have a choice.
Will you remain in this cycle forever? Are you going to keep blaming them? Are you going to keep giving excuses? You are not helpless.
There is a song I love so much, and that song helped me during a dark period of my life. A line from it says, “Holy Ghost, stay in me and do wonders.”

There is an endless possibility of what God can do through you, but the time is now. No more postponing, no more procrastinating.

2024, the year of awakening

The last sentence is my prayer to you:
Move in the name of Jesus!

‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5:14‬ ‭NLT‬‬
“For the light makes everything visible. This is why it is said, “Awake, O sleeper, rise up from the dead, and Christ will give you light.”


From me to you with all my love, 

Ayokunle.

If you gave your life to Jesus or rededicated your life while reading this post, If you also have questions, contact us at our email: theoliveebranch0@gmail.com 

Other write-ups by me are here

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Nobody ever really breaks down the reality of moving from a country you’ve known for 25 years of your life and starting over.
Everyone looks at the good side of it.
“At least you’re leaving naija” That was the anthem. “At least you’re leaving the trenches”
Well, I couldn’t really express to anyone the fear and anxiety that crippled me when I was about to leave.
The fear and anxiety that filled my thoughts at the airport and in the plane.
Looking back at my mum and brother and cousin and wishing they could all come with me.
I was so scared of the future and at the same time, I was excited.
I knew the future was bright, it was sunny but there was rain at that moment and soon, it fell from my eyes.
“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard Flight…” The voice of the pilot trailed in the background as I adjusted my seat and fastened my seatbelt. I was tired from the airport stress and I just wanted to close my eyes till the plane took off.
As I started my meditation, I felt a tap on my left shoulder. I didn’t expect any one to disturb me because I picked the window seat for that reason.

“Uh Ma’am..” the voice called this time and I just had to answer.
“Yes” I opened my eyes and faced the person beside me.
“The hostess passed the earpieces” I stopped paying attention obviously as I got lost in his face. He was the most handsome man I had ever seen and this is after many years of being around handsome people but this man in particular, there was something about his eyes…then I felt the tap again.
“Sorry..sorry” I cleared my throat and I collected the earpiece he was offering.
I quickly looked forward and plugged the earpiece.
The plane started taking off and I closed my eyes and prayed for a bit.
Gradually I slept off and I had a dream about my family members all playing together beckoning me to join them.

“Hey..wake up” I heard a distant voice calling me and I stirred and faced those eyes again. I was about to give him a piece of my mind till he cut me before I had even started.
“It’s time for food” . As soon as he said that, I relaxed a bit then adjusted myself and thanked him.
The food came and of course, i just ate the desserts and the bread. Whatever else was there wasn’t meant for me.
” You seem really picky..” the voice again said.
I looked at him confused.
“Picky with food, picky with words” he completed.
” I’m not really a talking person” I replied and as much as that was true, my closest friends would beg to differ. I was something else around them.
“That’s what most ladies say till you see them in their element” he continued.
“Well, this is my element” I scoffed. He had a snarky tone at the same time, like he was interested in talking more.
“I saw you praying earlier, seems you’re a Christian” he continued and I ignored wondering his concern with my religious occupation.
” I’m Deji by the way” he continued to talk and at this point, I was almost going to scream at him till my mum’s words played in my head like she was there with me
” Don’t be a snob o, remember to show people that you’re a nice girl”
I sighed then I answered “I’m Wale”
“Isn’t Wale a guy’s name?” I completed the statement with him.
“Yes but that’s what my dad named me” I stared deeply at him and he laughed.
” I knew you would say that, my sister’s name is kunle and that’s her very common response”
” Oh okay.” I said under my breath.
” Let me guess, masters degree?” He asked
” PhD..”
“That’s amazing..I’m also doing my PhD”
“Where?”
“ETSU” he answered.
“Well done” I said and he smiled.
“You won’t ask what course…” He asked and to be honest, as much as I was interested in having a conversation with him, I also wasn’t interested.
Moving to the US was my fresh start and I wasn’t sure I was ready to start engaging any new person now. I had a lot of junk I needed to settle first and I wasn’t going to add more to it.
“Public policy and management” he responded to a question I didn’t ask. I smiled and nodded looking for the earpiece so I could connect it to the tv and watch a movie. He seemed to get the hint as he picked up what I assumed to be his iPad and started reading something.
I knew that if I told my friends what had ensued between i and the stranger, they would almost cut my head but I didn’t care at this point. Peace of mind over anything else.
I selected “Eat,pray, love” and I started watching. The movie was about a woman who was on a search to discover herself after heartbreaks and when she eventually found love, she almost ran from it. The movie was sweet, almost familiar and it reminded me of someone.
After the movie ended, I checked the remaining flight time, We still had 2 hours to go.
I used the opportunity to meditate and pray some more because I needed to calm the balls of anxiety brewing in my stomach. The closer I got, the more nervous I was.
I didn’t know I was a bit loud till “Deji” tapped me.
“I’m sorry” I apologized in case I had disturbed his reading.
“Your praying didn’t offend me” he answered.
“Okay then” but as I was about to mind my business and carry on, he continued.
“I don’t mean to be overly forward but your anxiety is really very palpable..” I had started sweating at this point despite the cool atmosphere in the plane.
“5 years ago, I was in your shoes…i had no one to talk to though and I know I’m a stranger and I know you’re not supposed to confide in a stranger but I truly understand how you feel” He continued.
“The uncertainty, not knowing what it will be like, feeling like you may not fit in, you may not make friends, you may not thrive. Wanting to run back to the familiar that you know..”
He ended and at that moment I was not only shocked, my eyes were widened. He had described how I felt. Exactly how I felt.
“There’s a particular verse that helped me the first time I ever left home”
“What was it?” I asked with a very solemn tone.
“Be still and know that I am God” and at that moment, the tears came running down. That was the last thing my brother told me before we said our goodbyes.
He didn’t say anything else but only held my hand while I cried.
After a moment, I stopped and adjusted myself.
“Thank you very much.. ” I said with gratitude and that was all I could say.
“You don’t need to carry all the baggage Wale, give it to this God you pray so much to” he smiled and then we heard the call to announce to prepare for landing.
“Do you have a layover at Frankfurt too” I asked
“Yes I do” he answered.
“Okay” I said with much more relief.
We prepared to land and as I closed my eyes, I heard a voice as still and calm as the wind.
“I am with you even until the end of ages”

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The post Slow and steady appeared first on The Olive Branch.

How did I do it?

I ask myself this question multiple times.
I actually did it with the help of God, family, friends and you (yes you reading this). Thank you for all the support, for reading my Housejob chronicles for the past one year.
You gave me a sense of responsibility and audience and I could hear you all cheering me on saying ‘Go Esther! Go Esther’ and I put in all I had and I did it. You all know I had a very roller-coaster kind of HJ experience.
I also wanted the forthcoming houseofficers to have a documented experience of how housejob is. ( if you have specific topics/experiences you would want me to talk about let me know in the comment section 👇🏽)

My Struggles

Balancing my walk with God and medicine.

I’ve been shying away from writing this because it’s something I actually wasn’t happy with.
It’s a subject many of my colleagues have discussed randomly and it’s a struggle and I don’t know if I should say I felt better when I got to understand that I wasn’t the only one struggling. I had to learn to see my life and career path with a different perspective.
I might not have the luxury of time but my life and what I do is a ministry.
I should radiate God’s light in what I do. I was placed in the right time and space for someone who needs God. Whenever I had time to spare I would pray and the most important thing was to live a Christ-like life.
I also had to redefine how I felt my spiritual growth was meant to be. I made sure I made God my priority. I was always connected to him and when he gives me an instruction, I make sure I obeyed.
Church programs became online ones. Thank God for earpods,mask,wigs or braids. I could disguise 😂. They were so helpful. I had this community of friends that we had bible study together. I didn’t achieve this once. It took time and commitment.

Don’t just prioritise your schedule; schedule your priorities. Set aside a regular time to read the Bible and pray, schedule it as a top priority.
Medicine is an extremely jealous wife /husband 😂 but I tried and I will continue to put God first because without God I am nothing.

“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you” Matthew 6:33

Lord, in those difficult times when I seem to be in the refiner’s fire, help me to put my faith and trust in you and to ‘come forth as gold’. Help me every day to live a life of trust and confidence in you in Jesus name. (From BIOY with Nicky Gumbel)

I also had a hard time keeping up with friendships. I could barely text and call but I guess this is part of adulthood 😂. To everyone who checked up on me, I’m very grateful.

Lessons

Gold was refined and tested by heating it and skimming off the dross over and over again until the reflection of the goldsmith could be seen in it.
Through different career paths and experiences in our lives, I see that strength grows through struggles, courage develops in challenges and wisdom matures from wounds and through it all, the goal is to emerge as pure gold.

For the medics reading, Personally, HJ made me know where and what I won’t specialise in and where I would. So for some people you might not even know what you want to do yet but you know what you don’t want to do. At least, that’s a starting point. 😉

“Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it? For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you”
-Luke 14:28‭-‬29(NIV)

Sit down and think how you want your future to be. Count your cost and find your passion. That thing you wake up to each day and you’re happy to do no matter how fatigued you are. Don’t follow the crowd and don’t feel bad if you don’t like clinicals or you love clinicals and it’s like everyone is looking at you as a weirdo. There are different paths in life and there’s nothing as being fulfilled in what you do, if not you will be frustrated and frustrate people around you.
I’ve seen people who are passionate with what they they do and I have seen those who are not . There’s a very wide gap.

When work is a pleasure, life is a joy. When work is duty, life is slavery.

In conclusion, for the last time on my Housejob chronicles, it was sweet, fun-filled and crazy in the beginning but I explored and made memories. It became extremely rough in the middle and I wanted to run away but I had a soft landing at the end.

‘The end of a matter is better than its beginning…’
Ecclesiastes 7:8 NIV

I’m on to the next phase.

Thanks for walking with me. It means a whole lot 😘

Estée ✨💜
Your Medical Officer. 😂

The end of a matter is better than its beginning…’
Ecclesiastes 7:8 NIV

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……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Let’s talk about this 3rd lap that just passed 😂 coming from this , I had this fear of the unknown and I was also physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted . I didn’t know what to expect because I had seen the worst and I didn’t want to see it again. I had my colleagues tell me it was a calmer posting and you will be fine. You’ve got this. At this point it wasn’t seeing but experiencing that made me believe.

My first solo call +God
My anxiety level was out of the world, I was so scared like why would I be alone? How would I handle neonates? preemies all by myself. Those impossible IV lines? Alot of questions were running through my head.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
Philippians 4:6 NIV


I remember I was called to set an IV line in the midnight and I didn’t know I could do it but I did it. That encouraged me and added 1 % to my previous zero confidence battery and I scaled through that call.


Answered prayers

I’m convinced God has my best interest at heart no matter what. I had previously prayed that there would be more hands in this department and more people to work with and of course, new houseofficers came and it really made a difference.

Coping

I was always having dramatic cases like this that would stress me accompanied with fear. I always prayed for a calm call and I would say ‘ God help me’.
One day I realized I was saying the wrong prayer so I changed it and asked for extra grace and strength to cope. I had to become a problem solver with wisdom from God and help from people around me to also help people (patients) . God uses people by sending help through them to other people. I enjoyed that privilege from God and I’m grateful for my circle ❤️.
You never know why you’re there at that time for a particular person and I’m ready to be that available vessel for God to use.

Another thing I did was to pray for my patients, hospital isn’t a place to be. Being sick isn’t even the purpose of life.

I fell ill and for a week I couldn’t go to work, it wasn’t a nice experience and I’m thankful for the people around me and those far away that took care of me. God bless you all.

Experiences

Med students reading this let me give you a secret. They won’t teach you this in medical school 😂. You know that part of “I will like to take a detailed history down to the investigations you would do and what you will see in it” 😂
Its not always that straightforward. Especially in our setting, you can find yourself in a maze (ft the patient’s financial status, the lab, the logistics with the hospital and many more) and start looking for the way out and reaching so many dead ends before giving up. (I’d write a proper post on what school won’t teach you after all those years 🤣)

My motto is whatsoever your hand finds to do, do it well and if my conscience has been satisfied, I leave the rest to God because some things are way beyond your control in the system we have found ourselves in.

I also learnt how to eat more healthy and making the most out of natural things. As my consultant and Prof will say nature throws a festival, participate in it.

Miracle

I saw / heard the most heartfelt prayer I had ever seen. I had given up when this young boy involved in a RTA was rushed into the emergency. We couldn’t help at that point because it was really bad but we resuscitated and this woman held her son and prayed so hard. The atmosphere was hot, I had to join where I was documenting . She poured out her heart to God and before I knew it her son started responding. What shocked me the most was that the next morning he was eating moin moin and Pap. 😮
Truly, What God cannot do doesn’t exist.

Lessons.
• Do whatever you do well and put God first.
• Know that you’re there because God placed you there to be of help to someone. You’re God’s battleaxe
• Let God lead you and please obey him( I will write about an instance that I didn’t obey God😔) .
• I had to consciously balance my faith in God and medicine. To be honest it clashes a whole lot but what I know is God is God and He is the greatest physician.
• Shine God’s light wherever you go.
• Pray without ceasing.
• God is always with you, you’re never alone. That’s one thing I never forgot 😁


NB:
You will still be burnt out and feel like running away no matter what you do but one thing is to rest when you can and find out how you can recalibrate.

Order that ice cream, sharwama etc. You deserve it because not everyone can do this doctor thing but you did.



‘The end of a matter is better than its beginning…’
Ecclesiastes 7:8 NIV

I’m on to the next.. Last lap 💃🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

Thanks for going on this journey with me it means a whole lot 😘

Estée ✨💜

Crossing over into the new year as a Houseofficer

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