I welcome you again to the April edition of the Singles’ World for 2025. In the last edition, I discussed sexual compatibility and its place in the Christian marriage. I looked at the Biblical perspective and the need to avoid the doctrines of the devil on this. The importance of sexual compatibility in marriage cannot, therefore, be easily over-emphasised. In this edition, I will discuss with you the influence of modernism and secularism on Christian marriage.

There are emerging false doctrines and teachings that have put the Christian marriage under siege. Many of our youth today are being persuaded along these demonic doctrines that are contrary to the Word of God. It therefore becomes necessary for the true Church of God to blow the whistle and deliver this generation from these incipient doctrinal errors that are potentially dangerous for the singles and the married. Let me share some of these doctrines with you:

1. The Word of God (The Bible): In some climes, the Bible is being reduced to the word of men written by the Europeans to enslave the Africans. There is a call by these evil teachers to decolonise the Bible and make it truly African to meet the needs of Africans. They infer that Christianity is Western, while African Traditional Religion (ATR) is African.

They teach that we should all go back to our indigenous African religion and jettison the European religion and its Bible that was written to enslave the Africans. While everybody is entitled to his or her own ideology, this is an insidious and precarious modernist thought that is orchestrated to deconstruct the foundation of Christianity. Any belief system that undermines the authority of the Word of God is demonic, and it must be rejected outright.

The Bible, the Word of God was given by the inspiration of God- 2 Timothy 3:16 for humanity. It is not the treatise of the Europeans written for the enslavement of Africans. It is on this basis that all other doctrines follow. Don’t be swayed away by any demonic modernist doctrine from the wholesome doctrine of the Lord Jesus Christ which you have known from the beginning. The Bible is the grand norm for all Christians all over the world.

2. Polygamy: Therefore, these false teachers teach that monogamy is European, while polygamy is African. They aver that the Europeans injected monogamy into the Bible to reduce the population of Africans. Consequently, some ministers now preach openly in support of polygamy. Some people in the health sector teach that polygamy is an antidote to the prevalence of prostate enlargement in men. So, the frequency of sex necessitates the need for more wives to curtail the incidence of prostate issues in men.

Besides, we are told that polygamy will put an end to many cases of women that have delays in getting marriage partners. So, polygamy will make all women to be married. This is another demonic modernist philosophy that is influencing the Christian marriage today as more Christians appear to be more comfortable with this dangerous teaching, especially that it permits lasciviousness and sexual promiscuity. Hence, it appears like a popular dogma. Some of our girls readily agree to be the second or third wife now.

However, the popularisation of polygamy is a doctrine of the devil, and it is against the Word of God on marriage. In Matt. 19:4, Jesus said God made them male and female and not males and females. In Matt. 19:5, the Bible says “For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?” The Bible talks about a man cleaving to his wife and becoming two and not about a man cleaving to his wives and becoming two.

In 1 Cor. 7:2, the Bible says “Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” The Bible does not say “let every man have his own wives but his own wife.” Don’t accept this modernist evil doctrine that is intended to plunge the Christian marriage into chaos. The doctrine is a complete siege against the Christian marriage. The Bible is divine, and we should not allow anyone to secularise or demonise it in the name of modernism.

The Bible is supreme, and it must guide the conducts of Christians all over the world. If you are of age and you are not into any relationship yet, polygamy is not the answer. Wait on the Lord, and He will settle you. God knows that you need a partner; He will answer your prayer. Besides, more wives and frequent sex are not solutions to preventing prostate cancer. Don’t be deceived. There is no disease that God cannot heal.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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It is my joy and delight to welcome you to the February edition of Singles’ World for 2025. In the last edition, I discussed vocationally incompatibility with you, which is one of the trending issues affecting the love relationships of our singles today. In this edition, I discuss habitual dysfunctions that are potentially risky for marriages. These are the unconquered habits that have been attached to our lives since childhood that are now endangering most marriages; you are married to a personality, and it is this personality that we are to live with until death do us part. What couples experience as behavioural foundational deficits is incredibly disturbing and alarming. This calls for proper parenting, so that children can be brought up well. I will now address some examples of habitual or behavioural deficits.

Many couples regularly complain that their spouses are disorganised and careless. When you live with a careless and a disorganised person, you will realise you are living with Mr Stress or Mrs Stress. A careless and disorganised person is a bad planner. He muddles things up. He will not be able to discern between minor and major issues, important and frivolous issues, and significant and insignificant issues. When your partner is discussing very important issues, the careless partner may introduce or interject frivolous matters that he considers serious. He overlooked important details. He often makes mistakes without claiming responsibility for his actions but often makes excuses for his mistakes. Such a person acts on impulse without thinking about the consequences. He will disregard the established rules, procedures and safety protocols. Careless people are always reckless. He would like to engage in risky activities without thinking about potential dangers.

 Another trait is poor time management. He does not prioritise tasks, and that is why he will miss deadlines. Such a person will always procrastinate. How do you feel when your partner always postpones the important assignments given to him or her?  How do you live with someone who has an incorrect attitude towards time? Your partner is given a deadline to submit his application for employment, but he handles it with levity until the deadline expires. Your spouse makes you get to church services late every time. She always arrives at her duty place late, and there are complaints from her employers.

In addition, such people are always easily distracted. These are serious issues that can destabilise families. These observations are serious issues that families constantly battle. This began with individuals in their childhood. Unfortunately, some parents try their best and do not succeed, while others do not make much effort to discipline their children and prevent them from growing up with habitual dysfunction that will eventually ruin their lives and families.

Forgetfulness is another habitual dysfunction. Can you imagine your partner forgetting to brush his teeth every day? Can you imagine your partner forgetting to flush the toilet after using it? Can you imagine your partner forgetting to lock the door after coming inside it? Can you imagine your partner forgetting his or her car key at all times? There are families where partners regularly experience all this from their spouses without any solution. It is very challenging to be sincere.

Honestly, it is difficult to live with a partner in this habitual mess. However, the truth is that you cannot divorce your partner because of the character’s delinquency. In addition, individuals should be sincere to themselves and accept that they have these issues. They should then work on themselves and clean up their behavioural deficiencies. The problem is that after marriage, most people do not do anything to improve their character, especially when their spouses and others have been complaining of these unethical habits.

To minimise conflicts and reduce tension in the family, individuals should accept responsibility for their inappropriate and unacceptable behaviours, and take steps to overcome them. The singles should work assiduously on their characters before they get married. There is no point pretending that you are virtuous when indeed you are as rottenness in the bones of your partner-Prov. 12:4. Nobody is perfect and flawless. However, when there are noticeable, unquestionable, and unbearable flaws in your life, your best way is to address them diligently without any pretence. Practical steps, counselling, and prayers should be deployed, including deliverance, if necessary, to address them before it becomes too late.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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Compliments of the season to you all! Welcome to the first edition of Singles’ World in 2025. In the last edition, I discussed spatial incompatibility with you, which I consider an important foundational issue that can unsettle many homes if not resolved before marriage. If the man faces north and the woman faces south, they are spatially incompatible. You must resolve where both of you will settle in life, or else you may just be a nomadic or visiting couple. You will not really know each other, and your children may lack fatherly care, motherly care, or both. Besides, you may open the doors of your home to strange women and strange men. When infidelity sets in, divorce or broken home is inevitable.

In this edition, we will look at vocational or career incompatibility as another foundational issue that many intending couples often gloss over before marrying. When a marriage is built on vocational incompatibility, there will be upheavals that can be injurious to the stability of the home. You may be genetically and spatially compatible, and yet you are not vocationally compatible. In Genesis 2:18, God said he would provide Adam with an helpmeet that is suitable or compatible with him. You and your partner must be compatible physically, spiritually, intellectually, vocationally etc. or else there will be schism.

 If we are honest and sincere about ourselves during courtship, our problems will be manageable, but we sometimes become desperate in getting married and overlook the weightier matters of life that can weigh down our marriages. For instance, if you are called a pastor in the future, it is not any sister that you can marry. This is because it is not every Christian sister that is wired to marry a pastor. A pastor’s wife should be godly, virtuous, humble, supportive, hospitable, prayerful, wise, faithful, teachable and loyal to her husband, family and church.  A woman who is a human rights activist, feminist, or political activist will be incompatible with her husband’s pastoral ministry. This is because the core values of a pastoral ministry are radically different from those of human rights activism or feminism.

A feminist touts gender equality by compromising the biblical stand on the head position of the husband in the family. I have heard cases of women who refused to cooperate with their husbands’ pastoral ministries on the grounds that they were not called into the pastoral ministry. This can be challenging if it is not addressed before marriage. If you marry a potential pastor when you know undoubtedly that your vocation or personality is incompatible with the core values of the pastoral ministry of your husband, you are preparing for unmanageable trouble.

In addition, if you are a costumier or a professional theatre practitioner, whose vocation demands the deployment of African myths and rituals, traditional music and dance as well as the extensive use of makeups on stage, you are incompatible with a man called into the pastoral ministry. Of course, if your vocation is a Christian drama, you are compatible with a man’s pastoral ministry.   

Similarly, the work of a missionary involves frequent relocation, cultural adjustments, and unpredictable living conditions. If you value a settled lifestyle, you should not marry a missionary. Some Christian missionary organisations today ensure that missionaries marry missionaries to ensure stability in families.

In addition, if you are an 8-to-4 office worker and you want to marry a military officer whose work requires frequent deployments and unpredictable schedules that can be very challenging for a spouse with a traditional office job, you may not enjoy a settled home for life.  Again, if you are a politician, your life as a public officer requires transparency. Such a man is incompatible with a woman who is a private investigator, detective or investigative journalist whose job requires confidentiality.

In the Bible, Aquila and Priscilla as a married couple shared a vocational compatibility as tentmakers and ministers- Acts 18:2-3. Ruth and Boaz too were vocationally compatible as farmers and harvesters. Therefore, vocational compatibility is important in marriage relationships. If you are married to a spouse whose career is incompatible with yours, it is a terrible foundational problem that you will have to face for many years. It may be difficult to change one’s career after marriage in order to resolve the debacle. Prevention is usually cheaper, safer and more effective. May the Lord help you.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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Compliments of the season to you all! Welcome to the last edition of the Singles’ World for 2024. I hope the previous editions were of tremendous benefit to you. In the last edition, I discussed the second part of genotype incompatibility which I consider as another foundational issue that has affected many homes and marriages. In the Western world, this is no longer an issue because of the level of education and exposure, but in Africa, we tend to be very fanatical and then jettison genotype compatibility tests and enter into marriage. Even when some brethren know that they are not compatible genetically, they still go ahead with the marriage plans in the name of love or divine guidance. When the unforeseen happens, they will begin to contemplate divorce or getting married to another person contrary to the Word of God. Anyway, you are a product of your choice in life.

In this edition, I want to discuss spatial incompatibility in singles’ relationships. This is when physical space or geographical location becomes a point of contention and an irreconcilable issue in a relationship. This can also be a devastating foundational issue that can affect your marriage adversely. If this is not resolved before you get married, it can be a thorny foundational issue that can rock the boat of your marriage. Amos 3:3 says “Can two walk together except they be agreed.” Many quote this verse often without applying it to their lives.

Marriage is like a ship or a vehicle that is heading towards a destination. If both of you have different destinations in life, you are simply not meant for each other. For your ship to sail well, and for your vehicle to drive well, you must have an agreed destination or else you are preparing for an accident as both of you will be struggling with the steering wheel to drive to your different destinations. In The Book of Ruth 1:16, Ruth said “…For wither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will go; thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God.” Ruth aligns with Naomi’s location. See the end result, Jesus Christ came out of that lineage. It was a great thing.

For instance, you are working and living comfortably in the UK and your partner is also working and living comfortably in the USA, and neither of you is ready to give up his or her physical location and be ready to live permanently with each other after marriage, it just shows that both of you are geographically or spatially incompatible. Culturally and traditionally, it should be the woman that should relocate and meet her husband. For instance, it was Rebekah who left her place in Nahor to be married to Isaac in Beersheba which was about 450 miles approximately 724 kilometres from Rebekah’s place.

However, the nature and the peculiarities of their jobs may determine which of the jobs should be given up. For instance, if the woman is a Chief Executive Officer of a company with a juicy salary or a WHO consultant on Public Health in Canada with very attractive benefits, and the man is on a temporary or contract job with a firm in the UK without any sign that the contract will be renewed, the man may consider relocating to Canada and stay there and trust God for a better employment. If his wife has ego problem, and she is possessive and stubborn, it may be difficult for such a man to give up his temporary job and relocate to Canada and be married to a woman with a juicy job. Their marriage may not end well.

So, it is important to resolve all this before getting married, especially when employment outside the country for foreigners can be a dicey issue. The same thing applies to those living in the same country but not in the same state. The man has a good job in Abuja, but his fiancée is a proprietor of a flourishing school in Lagos. The man is not ready to leave his job and relocate to Lagos and start looking for a new job, and his job is not transferrable. The woman on the other hand is not ready to close down her school and start all over in Abuja, and yet they claim they love each other. This is spatial incompatibility. If it is not resolved before they get married, their marriage will not work. The man may start going to Lagos monthly to see his wife. Before long, he will be fed up. Meanwhile, there are side chicks that are ready to solve his loneliness in Abuja with “thermos ministry” including the “other room.” The proprietor wife too may also have some men around her to give her maximum satisfaction or at least fill the gap. Of course, the woman is comfortable with money, and there are qualified men to give her the emotional and sexual satisfaction.

Most people do not think about all this before going into marriage. Before too long, the other person may start feeling lonely, and she may go into depression. This is one of the reasons responsible for the prevalence of infidelity, depression, broken homes, spousal assault and divorce. The husband and the wife are naturally meant to live together and build their home together. If they have to live separately, it will have to be for a short time. Spatial incompatibility is a terrible foundational issue that may hinder you from having marital fulfilment in life. Think and discuss this before getting married or else, your marriage may be tempestuous and turbulent. If you cannot resolve it, it is better to part ways. Forewarned is forearmed.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Wishing you a Prosperous 2025.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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I am delighted to welcome you to the October edition of the Singles’ World. In the last edition, I ended my discourse on bewitchment. We have been dealing with foundational issues in the family for some time now because of its devastating impact on many homes. To refresh your memory, foundational issues are often more difficult to tackle in marriage than others. This is because they form the bedrock of our lives and homes on which we were either born or issues that have been ingrained, entrenched and deep-rooted in our lives which have virtually become  irredeemable or unalterable parts of our lives.

Most times, would-be couples do not pay attention to all this. We are either ignorant and allow love to blind our eyes and move into an unmanageable and unworkable relationship. Sometimes too, it is due to religious fanaticism, overzealousness, impatience, doctrinal error, wrong counsel and guidance. Unfortunately, none of these reasons is sufficient, according to Matthew 19:9 to dissolve such a marriage when confronted with any life-threatening foundational issue. I pray that this piece will be a blessing to you in the name of Jesus Christ.

Genotype compatibility has continued to generate issues in society including the church of God. There are two schools of thought that we will discuss here and then give my opinion.

1. The Faith-Based School of Thought: This school of thought believes that you don’t need genotype incompatibility to determine your choice in marriage. It emphasises spiritual faith in God and God’s will in marriage. It relies on divine guidance completely. It believes that once God has ordained your union with your partner, genotype compatibility is not necessary.

To them, once God has spoken, human intervention or investigation is inconsequential. For instance, medical science says AS brother should not marry AS sister because their children will be potential SS carriers, but the Faith-Based School says once they are sure it is God that has ordained their relationship, they can go ahead and get married, and there will be no problem afterwards because God is beyond their genotype incompatibility.

After all, He is an omniscient and omnipotent God, and there is nothing that He cannot do. They believe that God can give the couple AS or AA children instead of the expected SS children. They  believe that God can even change the genotypes of both of them because with God all things are possible.

To illustrate this school, a man of God said there was a brother with an AS blood genotype who was engaged to a sister with an AS blood genotype. They were determined to get married because God had led them together. The man of God said if they were sure it was God, they should go ahead and get married. The man of God believes that blood genotype incompatibility is immaterial when you are sure of God’s guidance. Fortunately, according to the testimony of the man of God, this couple never gave birth to children with the SS blood genotype. That is unbelievable.

Also, I know a man who is AS and his partner is SC. Despite the outcry of some people to dissuade this man from marrying the woman on the grounds of genotype incompatibility, the man went ahead and married the SC woman not because God told him to marry her, but because he loved her. After marriage, the wife had a lot of crises which made the marriage very turbulent for the man, as the wife moved from one hospital to the other for medical intervention. Fortunately for the couple, none of their four children has the SS blood genotype. That is incredible. It is against these occurrences that some believe genotype incompatibility in marriage should not be considered in choosing a life partner. We will now look at the second school of thought.

2. The Scientific or Medical Pragmatism School of Thought: This school of thought emphasises the genotype compatibility test to avoid marital crisis and genetic disorders. The emphasis here is on medical science and genetic factors to make informed decisions. This School of Thought prioritises the well-being of individuals and marital fulfilment. That is why AS versus AS, AS versus SS, AS versus SC, SC versus SC etc. are incompatible partners. Scientifically, the children of such unions will face a lot of stress and crises in life, and their parents will never enjoy their marriages. I know of families that have separated because of genotype incompatibility when their children began to die one after the other. Such SS children are usually truants in schools, and their parents spend a lot of money on managing them because of genotype incompatibility.

Which of these two schools is right? Please, note that God is not against medical sciences. Luke in the Bible was a physician. There is no prize for anybody in Heaven who refuses medical treatment and depends on faith throughout his lifetime on the earth. It is not a sin to seek medical help. Our life should be guided by discretion, and that is why the Proverbs 4:7 says “wisdom is the principal thing.” Life is a choice, and we are all products of our choices in life. I believe that those who married with genotype incompatibility and without having SS children are enjoying the mercy of God, and that is not a licence to continue to toe that path.

Genotype incompatibility is one of the most terrible foundational issues rocking many families today, and it is not a condition for divorcing your partner as a Christian according to Matt. 19:9. Proverbs 22:3 says “A prudent man forseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished.” The NIV version says “A prudent person sees danger and takes refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it.” If your blood genotype is not compatible with the blood genotype of your partner, it is crazy and risky going ahead to consummate the relationship. Why do you want to suffer for life for what is preventable and avoidable? This is not a foundational issue that you can manage. Avoid it now, and enjoy your life. Don’t allow a temporary marriage to destroy your eternity.

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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You are warmly welcome to the March edition of the Singles’ World. In the last edition, I concluded my discussion on demonic children as one of the foundational problems rocking families today. In this edition, I will discuss another very serious foundational and fundamental issue affecting many homes. The import of this is for the singles to avoid it and for those who are facing it to recognise the enormity of the challenges and tackle them by the wisdom of God. It is my sincere prayers that you will not enter into this debacle in the name of Jesus Christ, and if you are already into it, the Lord will deliver you. 

Demonic and Possessive Mother-in-Law: As I said in the previous editions, foundational issues in marriage are usually very difficult to resolve. Prevention, as they say is not just better than cure, it is cheaper. Proverbs 22:3 says “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished.” First, God expects you to be wise. It is that wisdom, which is the principal thing, according Prov. 4:7 that will make you see evil coming and hide yourself.

When a wise man sees the evil coming and refuses to hide himself, the Bible says. He will be punished. The Bible does not say he will be pardoned or protected. Even if the Lord forgives him of his disobedience, he will still suffer the consequences. If the Lord tells you not to marry an unbeliever and you refuse and marry him, when he turns you into his punching bag; that is your punishment for your disobedience. Of course, God will forgive you if you genuinely repent. So, foundational issues are better avoided than managed.

In many cultures of the world, in-laws occupy prominent positions in the marriage institution. In Africa, for instance, you are not just married to your spouse but to the entire family of your spouse. The roles of the father-in-law and the mother-in-law are quite very cultural and traditional. Jethro was Moses’ father-in-law in the Bible; the father of Zipporah, the wife of Moses. The timely godly management skill that he gave Moses helped him greatly in his ministerial assignment.

When Isaac took Rebekah, the Bible says, he brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent-Gen. 24:67.  So, here we see that Sarah was Rebekah’s mother-in-law. In-laws can be greatly helpful, and they can be terribly nasty and irritating. The focus here is to look at the demonic and possessive in-laws who are majorly mothers-in-law, although we do have some very antagonistic fathers-in law. From research and experience, mothers-in-law can be that terrible, as they often constitute nuisance in the families of their children. We will look at a particular type of mother-in-law here now.

A.    There are women whose children are their eyes. They possess them in totality. This is not a natural but a demonic possession. Some of them believe that when their sons get married, their wives will take away their love from them. Therefore, they will not have full access to their sons anymore.  It is their husbands that will be reaping all their labours on them. They wonder why their children cannot visit them when they like. They are not always comfortable that their children want to get married. They will do everything possible to delay their marriage proposals and waste their time. In essence, such women are ‘married’ to their own children. If you want to marry the son of such a woman, it is going to be war. Be ready to marry her and her mother. There may be a soul tie between such a woman and her son.

 In most cases, it is this woman that will be running your house for you. Your husband, who is mummy’s boy, will always take to his mummy advice because of the special love that he has for her. When she comes visiting, that is the Thatcher of the house giving you orders on how she wants her son’s house to look like. If you have such a mother-in-law, you have two husbands, your mother-in-law first and then your husband. Remember, you cannot serve two masters. Some of the traits of such a mother-in-law are listed below:

1.     She wants to know your earnings and the earnings of her son.  

2.     She wants to know how much your husband is giving you on monthly basis; if it is too much, she will tell her son to reduce it. She may not talk if it is small. She has come to stop you from ‘wasting’ her son’s resources.

3.     She wants to know your menstrual cycle.

4.     She wants to know if you are pregnant or not and also your expected day of delivery (EDD) because of her curiosity. And if you are not pregnant on time, she already has her solutions whether you like it or not.

5.     She will dictate what she wants to eat and what you should cook for her son.

6.     If she is agile, she can take over your kitchen from you and begin to cook for her son.

7.     She does not need your permission to enter her son’s bedroom after all, it her son’s house. 

8.     Her son is the apple of her eye, and nothing must happen to him.  

9.     When she is not staying with you, she can summon her son to come and see her without giving him any adequate notice. You dare not oppose that lest you are in trouble. She can even ask all of you to come home and spend Christmas with her.  

10.  If you are busy or your baby is crying, she can breastfeed your baby for you without your permission and you dare not protest. There will be trouble.

When you see that your partner is mummy’s boy or mama’s boy according to the US English, please don’t wait. Run for dear life. Neither you nor your husband will be able to manage such a domineering, manipulative, oppressive, demonic and cantankerous mother-in-law. Can you imagine someone having Jezebel as mother-in-law?

 In most cases, your husband will be a yes-man to his mum. He will not like to offend her. In such homes, the wife is more or else like a housemaid or a slave. Many of such mothers-in-law are in society today, and they are posing great dangers to the families of their children. It is a fundamental issue that those who are into it may have to battle with for a very long time. If you like, be praying that they should die by fire, it may take time and the damages done to the home may be monumental, calamitous, irredeemable and irreparable. 

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month.

Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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Welcome to the February edition of the Singles’ World.  In the last edition, I discussed demonic children as one of the foundational problems affecting many homes and families today. In this edition, I will continue from where I stopped. It is my prayer that the Lord will deliver families that are going through this in the name of Jesus Christ. 

• Demonic Children: Some consult babalawo (diviner). Some of the medicines obtained from these sources are directed to be used weirdly either before copulation or after copulation. Some are used by both the couple. Some women are asked to strap plantain stems or yam tubers on their backs at some specific hours of the day or of the night to symbolise the presence of the upcoming baby. Some can also be asked to carry some sacrifices to aid their quick conception.

Babies produced through all these traditional and demonic interventions are in our midst today as friends, classmates, roommates, bunkmates, siblings etc. They too will want to get married one day. Unfortunately, their consent was not sought before their parents obtained them from the idols with covenants. They had no control over their parentage or ancestry. Now that they are grown up adults, they want to live and enjoy what others are enjoying too including getting married.

Apart from those who deliberately consult diviners and idols, some demonic powers can tamper with the pregnancies of some women and exchange the babies in their wombs with demonic ones without the knowledge of the expectant mother. That is why they often say that pregnant women must not go out at 1:00 p.m. or enter the traditional market places in the afternoon. It is also said that pregnant women should not go to the riverside in the afternoon or go out at night.

It is believed that these demonic forces are very active at such periods. That is why pregnant women must be prayerful and be born again if they are not. They should regularly cover themselves with the blood of Jesus Christ. They have no reasons to be afraid as long as they are in Christ Jesus. Those that are not in Christ Jesus are not safe from this demonic oppression and possession. Their pregnancies can be manipulated and their babies will be demonised unknown to the parents.

We have many of them in society today causing troubles and pains. Isaiah 30:9 says “That this is a rebellious people, lying children, children that will not hear the law of the Lord.” Those are children that curse their fathers-Prov. 30:11. Those who can curse their parents can kill their spouses when they get married, because they are demonic children.

Getting married to them is like getting married to the devil. In most cases, they may not know these foundational issues that surround their birth. Some parents will not tell them, and some parents, after getting their babies, renege on the promises and the covenants they made with the idols; the goat they promised to bring to the babalawo annually, the dog or pig they promised to give Olokun yearly. Hence, the young man will face battles in life even before he gets married.  

Some of the characteristics of such people obtained from the idols are listed below:

1. Battling with spirit wife/husband.
2. Polluted foundation
3. Sexual lust and perversion
4. Excessive and uncontrollable anger
5. Regular and constant evil dreams
6. Lateness in getting married
7. Attracted to the wrong partner
8. Deadlock in marriage
9. Hostility in the home
10. Childlessness
11. Poverty
12. Adultery and Divorce
13. Untimely death

The manifestations are inexhaustible. If such people get married, welcome to a marriage of continuous and endless battles, conflicts and struggles without any end in sight. You are not just battling with your spouse; you are in battle with invisible forces behind the birth of your partner. How can you live with emere or ogbanje (spirit child) as your spouse and not have troubles in life. There is no free gift from the devil. When the devil asks you for your cap, he will come for your head later. When he asks you for an egg, he will take a hen from you soon. There is no how you can resolve such marital conflicts in the house without doing something about the polluted foundation of your partner.

If you are already married to a spirit in a human form or to a man or woman with a polluted foundation, how do you get out of this bondage? How do you identify such people? It is only God that can reveal such people to you if you are patient in prayers. Even the person may not know, but the manifestations will be obvious in his life. They are usually difficult, troublesome and uncontrollable children. By the time they are married, it is hell, mehn! If you are lucky to know that your parents asked of you from the idols of the land with covenants attached to it, you need to:

1. Give your life to Jesus Christ and be born again genuinely now.  
2. Repent of your sins.
3. Renounce every known and unknown covenant either made by you or made on your behalf.
4. Go for a thorough deliverance from the foundational bondage.
5. Be filled with the Holy Ghost with the evidence of speaking in tongues.
6. Attend regularly a Bible believing church.
7. Live a holy life.
8. Study the Bible regularly
9. Have a regular personal fellowship with the Lord.
10. Pray without ceasing.

If the Lord sets you free, you will be free indeed. Until you are born again and delivered, don’t get married yet. If the Lord reveals that your future partner or the man or woman you intend to talk to about marriage has this evil foundation, it is advisable to keep off or else, you will be in for troubles for life or for a very long time. It is not a law; it is an advice. Foundational issues in marriage are very difficult to resolve or tackle. The best way is to avoid them. Proverbs 27:12 says “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished.”

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

The post SINGLES WORLD- FEBRUARY EDITION’24 appeared first on The Olive Branch.

In the September edition of our Singles’ World, I discussed obstructiveness as one of the features of a spoilt brat. I also made the point that spoilt brats are difficult to live with as marriage partners because it is a foundational and problematic issue. In this edition, I will discuss another feature of spoilt brats so that you can avoid them as marriage partners if you want to enjoy the full blessings of your marriage and live long. May the Lord help you to obey Him and make the right choice in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen. 

In addition to disobedience, naughtiness, attention-seeking, despondency and obstructiveness, we will consider one other behavioural indicator of a spoilt brat: 

4. Temper: Spoilt brats are very temperamental. Recall that we said spoilt brats are products of poor parenting or lack of proper parenting. Spoilt brats are touchy, petulant and cantankerous. At the early stage when the child was misbehaving and flaring up at the slightest provocation and crying over trivial issues, he was being pampered instead of being disciplined. He would naturally think that his parents approved of his behaviour by pampering him. 

He was not reproved and rebuked seriously for being finicky, fastidious, unaccommodating, irritable and bad-tempered according to Proverbs 29:15 that says “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.” He was always idolised and appeased like the mythical Sango when angry. When such a child grows up with this behavioural dysfunctionality and attitudinal abnormality, it becomes very difficult for the child to change because all this mess, like a plague, had been glued to his life during his formative years. He has thus grown up as a man that is deformed in character. She has now grown up with evidence of physical features but with a lot of seemingly irreparable character flaws. 

All the intolerable, unbearable and unacceptable habits in any sane society have been well formed in him. It is like trying to bend a roasted fish without expecting it to break. When such a temperamental man or woman gets married, it takes a lot of patience, long suffering and endurance to live with such a person. He or she will be very fussy and crabby over frivolous issues that should be overlooked. 

When such a husband gets angry, he may refuse to eat the food prepared by his wife. He may resort to stonewalling. He may walk out of the house and come back late in the night. He may be malicious towards his wife and if provoked further instead of being appeased, it can lead to assault. If the wife is ready to placate him with every gift of humility in her, she may calm him down temporarily. 

Also, when such a wife gets angry, she may refuse to cook. She will close the door of romance. Besides, she can cry for days until she is appeased by the husband just as her parents were doing for her when she was young. If nobody appeases her, she may contemplate suicide depending on the gravity of the cause of her anger. This is one of the foundational issues rocking many homes today. Spousal abuse, assault and murder are on the increase today. Some bad-tempered husbands return their wives’ insults with assaults, while some irascible wives return their husbands’ insults with insults and assaults with assaults.

In some of the recent reported cases, such fracas and altercations have resulted to death on both sides. It is scary and frightening listing examples of such cases here. You cannot live with a touchy and angry spouse and expect to live long. That is why Proverbs 22:24 says “Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go.” To balance it, Proverbs 21:19 says “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.” 

You cannot live happily with either an angry man or an angry woman. An angry person will never be a good listener. He will be very impatient, easily irritable and inhospitable. Even God cannot use such as His minister. Titus 1:7 says to qualify as a bishop, the person must not be soon angry. 

If you are not married, don’t inherit an unbearable foundational problem which you didn’t know anything about in the name of love. You may not be able to carry this cross.  Make your choices wisely. The God of Heaven will help you as you depend upon His guidance. If you are married to a temperamental spouse, with prayers, patience and obedience to the Holy Spirit, you can navigate through the storm. The Lord will help you.     

By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please do not forget to send me your comments and testimonies. If you are not born again, please surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Tomorrow may be too late. Until then, God bless you. Amen.

Pastor Jide Ajidahun

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