THOSE WHO ARE NOT QUALIFIED TO MARRY
I welcome you again to the June edition of our Singles World for 2022. Here again, I will be discussing with you the twelfth characteristic of those you should not marry. May the Lord lead you and guide you into choosing right in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
Don’t Marry Someone who is Frigid and Sexually Unresponsive.
12. Just as it will be precarious for you to marry an impotent man, to marry someone who is frigid and sexually unresponsive will also be calamitous. As I discussed with you earlier, sex was created by God for the benefit of the husband and his wife in a marriage relationship. Without it, marriage will be meaningless. In fact, one reason why God wants us to marry is to prevent us from falling into immorality. And for the singles that are burning, the Bible admonishes them to go and marry provided they are qualified and ready- 1 Corinthians 7:1-9. So the Bible recognises the place of sex in a marriage relationship. That is why husbands and wives are admonished not to deny one another of sex.
In the world today, there are people especially women that are frigid and sexually unresponsive. No matter how you try to seduce and arouse them, they will be cold and insensitive. That is indeed a serious issue. Whoever that is frigid and sexually impassive should keep off from marriage. Marriage without sex is like soup without salt or like salt that has lost its savour. Such a marriage has no value. Some of the characteristics of people that are frigid and sexually unresponsive include:
They lack sexual desire and even if they show desire for it, it will be with a great effort (hyposexuality). Such women will be unable to achieve orgasm called orgasmic dysfunction or female orgasmic disorder (anorgasmia) during any sexual act. Consequently, they will not long for another sexual act again. It is like somebody who does not always have appetite for food and anytime you force her to eat, it is always a battle. She can even throw up or mess up the food. You can imagine what the person that prepared the food will feel.
So, a frigid woman lacks sexual desire. In fact, sexual act is a burden for her rather than a pleasurable act. Each time, she sees sex as a tool of oppression by the man rather than as a tool of love. A student who does not have any desire to study will fail. A Christian who does not have any desire to pray and read his Bible cannot grow spiritually. A patient who does not have a desire to take his medications as prescribed by his doctor is inviting death. Similarly, a married woman who does not have any desire for sex with her husband is inviting adultery and divorce into her home.
Some women will experience pain during intercourse. Since they are not really interested in it, their unresponsiveness to sexual stimulation and arousal will cause them pain. When what you ought to be enjoying is giving you pains, the right thing to do is to call it quit. While that is satisfactory to the wife, it is displeasing to the husband. To such women, it is like eating while you are having a stomach ache. You cannot be crying and laughing at the same time. When women are in pains during sex, it is the final whistle.
Frigid women don’t experience much sensation in their genital and erogenous areas no matter the depth and the duration of the foreplay. Hence, sex becomes a weight and an encumbrance for her.
Lack of interest in sexual talks: Such women are usually not interested in any form of sexual talk.
Some of the causes of female sexual dysfunction include depression, history of rape, family history of sexual abuse and wife battery, stress, poor body image, relationship issues, trauma, hormonal and anatomical problems, untreated diseases, medications, hereditary and spiritual issues. If you want to marry a frigid woman, be expecting some of the following:
A dreary and unexciting marriage
A fruitless marriage
An angry husband
Troubles
Infidelity and children born out of wedlock
Divorce/Broken home
Now, how will you know that your fiancée is frigid and sexually unresponsive without trying to go to bed with her? Fornication is not the right way to detect a frigid and a sexually unresponsive woman. So, don’t ever try that way.
First, you can pray sincerely and ask God to reveal the woman to you? If indeed she has this female sexual dysfunction, the Lord can reveal it to you and even her entire health condition.
Second, you can discuss her sexual, medical and psychosocial history with her although she may not tell you the whole truth. The Holy Spirit will help you to discover the hidden truth.
Third, although such women don’t like opening up to doctors about their sexual and mental conditions, an attempt should be made for her to see a qualified doctor for appropriate diagnosis and treatment. She can also see mental health professionals or sex therapists. Her hormonal analysis may require estrogen hormone therapy depending on the diagnosis.
Fourth, if you are very sensitive too, you will discover that she is not interested in sexual talks each time you raise it with her. Also, some of his friends may tell you jokingly or indirectly. Each time you are close to her you will notice that she is terribly impassive sexually. You will feel like you are sitting with another man.
By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please, don’t forget to send me your comments and testimonies. In case, you are not born again, please, surrender your life to Jesus Christ today. Till then, stay safe and God bless you. Amen.
Pastor Jide Ajidahun
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Marriage without sex is like soup without salt or like salt that has lost its savour. Such a marriage has no value.
