THE QUESTIONS SINGLES ASK 14
Welcome back to the February edition of our singles world. I believe that you are being blessed. In this edition, I will like to answer more questions. May the Holy Spirit direct our thoughts aright in the name of Jesus Christ.
Question: Is it compulsory we talk to God or ask God about the woman we should marry?
Answer: It is not compulsory provided you can face life without God. Leaving God out of your marriage is like a plane without a pilot. It is like a car without a driver. It is like walking with eyesight. You may walk, but you cannot go far. Even the blind need to be guided. If you plan to travel to Lagos, and you get to the motor park in the morning where there are ready vehicles going to Lagos, while some vehicles have drivers, some don’t have drivers, will you board the ones that have no drivers? Definitely not! If you board a vehicle that has no driver, you will not leave the same spot. And you will never get to your destination.
Similarly, if you leave God out of your marital life, you will be stranded, and you will never get to your destination. Besides, if you leave God out of your marriage, the devil will take over. There is no middle course. You are either for God or for the devil. Again, God is the creator and the originator of marriage. He has the manual of marriage in His hands. If you don’t allow Him to guide you, you will be lost. The roadmap to a successful marriage is in His hands. Without His guidance, you will be lost.
Jesus said in John 15:5, “for without me ye can do nothing.” Did you create yourself? Who covered you when you were in your mother’s womb? (Psalm 139:13). Do you know how bones grow in the womb? (Ecc. 11:5). Who took you out of your mother’s womb? (Psalm 22:9). Can you hide from God? (Psalm 139:7). In Psalm 32:8, the Bible says, “I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye.” In Psalm 48:14, the Bible says “For this God is our God for ever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death.”
John 3:27 says, “A man can receive nothing, except it be given him from heaven.” You cannot receive a good wife or a good husband without God’s approval. That is why Proverbs 19:14b says “And a prudent wife is from the Lord.” The Message Bible says “But a congenial (friendly, pleasant, good-natured) spouse comes straight from God.” Emphasis mine. If you want a good wife or a good husband, you ask God. However, if you want just any wife or any husband, the devil has them in abundance.
God wants to guide us even unto death on all issues of our lives including who to marry. If Jesus had not guided Peter in Luke 5 when his professional skills as a fisherman failed him, he would have returned home miserably and despondently. Do you know what will happen tomorrow? Do you know what lies ahead of you? Do you know what your future will look like? You will need God now and forever in all areas of your life if you want to succeed.
The only thing that does not need to be guided is the ant- Proverbs 6:7. If you are an ant, then you don’t need God. But remember God is the creator of ants. Can the creature be wiser than its creator? No! In case you are thinking of visiting spiritualists or diviners, they too consult some demonic powers for guidance. They will mislead you and demonise your marriage. If you are not born again, confess your sins to God. Repent of your sins, and give your life to Jesus. Receive Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour. He will save you, and He will give you a new life. Receive Jesus now.
Question: Two people are engaged, and they plan to get married in the next nine months. Wedding plans are ongoing. The woman just heard about a teaching that says it is important for her to hear from God first before going into any relationship, and she did not hear from God before going into her relationship. Should she quit on the grounds that she did not hear from God or continue and be asking God to show her mercy?
Answer: Going into any relationship without hearing from God first is like putting the cart before the horse. It is like giving an answer before listening to the question. It is like writing an examination without reading the instructions. It is like jumping into the river before realizing that you cannot swim. It is like taking drugs without reading either the Doctor’s prescription or the manufacturer’s instruction.
If a nurse, in error, wants to give you an injection that is meant for an epileptic patient instead of an antimalarial injection that the doctor prescribes for you, and suddenly, she discovers her error even when you are ready for the injection, should she continue or stop on the grounds that her syringe is already filled with the injection and that the patient is ready? Common sense tells us that she should stop. And if she tells you about the fatal error that she would have made, you should give thanks to God in Church on Sunday.
If you are engaged to your partner, and you discover a month to your wedding that he is already married with two children living in another city or country, will you go ahead with the wedding? As a good Christian, it is not advisable even though it is painful. If you go ahead, the marriage is not binding. Besides, the other woman, who is legally married to him, will deal with you with every power at her disposal legally and otherwise. Even if she does not deal with you, you will pay for it someday.
If you discover at any time before marriage why you should not continue with the relationship, you should discontinue with it. If you did not ask God before, and now you discover that God is not in support of the relationship, the right thing to do is to quit. But be sure this is your reason. Don’t hide under this to break the heart of your partner. Hope it is not because there is a brother with a readymade US or Canada visa that is beckoning to you? Hope it is not because you have found a richer brother?
If you have just discovered the will of God, you are free to quit, please since you are not married yet. But it is usually better to seek God’s will before entering into any relationship. The brother and his parents will be hurt no doubt but prayerfully apologise to him and to his family for wasting their time and for hurting them. Asking for God’s mercy against His will is like living in sin continuously and be asking God for His mercy. God forbid! Romans 6:1-2A says, “What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? God forbid.
If you are sure God wants you to quit, don’t be emotional about it. Don’t let them persuade you to continue with it. A broken relationship is better than a broken home. Even though it hurts, it will heal up ultimately. Proverbs 27: 12 says, “A prudent man forseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished.”
By the grace of God, we will continue from here next month. Please, don’t forget to send me your comments. Till then, God bless.
Pastor Jide Ajidahun.
